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Thu 5 Jun, 2003 08:00 am
Chocolate
I open the exquisite box of chocolates, which has lavender hearts and a plain white back ground on it. The chocolates are pink in colour and they are diamond in shape. It possesses a pleasant scent, which is the smell of cranberry and strawberry. Two perfect fruit mix together with blandness charmingly and become the best chocolate flavor ever. When I pick it up with two of my fingers, what I can only feel is merely coldness. But once I put in my mouth and let it melt itself instead of crunching it, everything in front of me changes phantasmagorically. The feeling is totally different that cannot describe by words. A blast of warmth spread over my entire body and makes me never feel cold anymore. It is the sweetest and the best chocolate I have ever tasted. It is sweeter than any honey in the world and the scent can even melt my throbbing heart no matter how many wounds on it. This chocolate is too perfect for me, too unique and so extraordinary. I always wonder if it is a waste for me to taste? Once I start chewing, it makes me start thinking. The nuts in it crack into grainy pieces and start reacting with my saliva and start its sparkling. Once I start eating it, I cannot stop. I am addicted to itÂ…
James, you write with enough delectible description, to cause me to crave a box of chocolates.
Interesting.
If you really want your work critiqued- I will tell you to be careful of your use of 'singular and plural' subjects. AS:
Quote: The chocolates are pink in colour and it is diamond in shape.
(good subject, chocolate)
The chocolate is only a metaphor.
These feelings are only an imagination when I can be with the one I love...
How sweet its gonna be if she likes me...