You Almighty

My supreme act would be to expand the size of the planet, drastically. Where one could now walk from the occupied territories into Israel, it would be necessary to take a plane or bus. Every unsavory leader would be placed thousands of miles away from their homelands, with no money, no friends. Families would have space of about fifty square miles to build their homes. Roads and other infrastructure would be expanded accordingly. Famine areas would move to productive lands. The oceans would be tapped as a source of fresh water - not fresh water oceans, but processes by which water could be cheaply purified.

The very first thing I would do is to replace this administration with somebody less fearful - "a unifier, not a divider" as it were. c.i.

edgar,

Don't expand the planet please. We'd not be able to walk anymore due to the gravity.

I'm God. I can increase gravity for this one and decrease it for that one at will - for only a week.

God, please make people smarter. For just one week's ok.

At least I would not let bears snack on submarines.

i would ban elevator musak

Make the wimmins smarter, 'k, Edgar?

Country boy is moaning and crying, and wandering distractedly in the woods, and crying out to God for relief. Then, suddenly, dark clouds roll up, they part, a blinding beam of light transfixes the boy, and a deep voice rumbles out:

"What is it, my son, why are you troubled?"

"Oh God, it's Enigma Jean . . . why did you make girls so darn purty?"

"That's so you'd love them, boy."

"But why did you make them so darned stupid?"

"Well, boy, that's so they'd love you."

Woman is only dumb til she catches you.

Hah! Craven knows full well that his first act as god for a week would be to make himself god forever!

His second would be to make all cats shaven in an instant.

I believe it would be downhill from there.......

True deb.

Everytime someone asked me "if you had three wishes..."

My reply was that my first wish would be that all my wishes would come true, or omipotece or some such.

But that's just in theory. In practice I imagine power to be a pain.

Being God must be horrible. What with humans and all.

The humans we have always with us - being one and such, don't you know.....

But you would be infinitely patient, dear Craven...

(good thing, too.)

Not me . . .

If i get to be God Almighty, i'm gonna be just like the god of the old testament: piss me off, and i'll lay waste yer city with a gesture of my hand . . .

In every human being, understanding would be as natural as sexual desire.

Order death for all the Republicans, then put the rest of the conservatives on notice!!

Anon

Well, I am a ****, so I might decide to make everyone gods, then just sit back and watch the fun...this of course with the assumption that I am still the supreme god....

Anon,

Come on! That's horrible.