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Poorness... is a state of mind

 
 
vfr
 
Reply Sat 8 Oct, 2005 06:31 am
Written for a 12 step group



Poor? Poor is a state of mind and all such problems are created in the mind. From 'As A Man Thniketh'..."Wretchedness, not lack of material possessions, is the measure of wrong thought. A man may be cursed and rich; he may be blessed and poor...the poor man only descends into wretchedness when he regards his lot as a burden unjustly imposed." How can a person like Thoreau feel rich with $10 in his pocket, yet many a modern day millionaire feels poor? In two words - Self Worth. Self worth cannot be bought and resides within a person whereas money is external and sits in a bank vault. The acid test for such things is to take away a person possessions and strip a person naked and see how much self worth is left? Was all their self worth wrapped up in their house? Their car? Their trophy wife? Their bank account? If you ever wonder why rich people sometimes commit suicide after they have lost their wealth, this is the reason. All their self worth was locked up in a bank vault - there was nothing left within them to live for.

If you equate living within a budget as being poor, then you are not looking at the big picture. To be practical, everyone has a budget to live within, if they want to manage their money successfully and stay solvent. Even Bill Gates with his billions has a budget. Depending on which projects he would take on, his billions wouldn't go far enough. Or lets go to the ultimate source, the US Government. Even though they can print money at will (more or less) they have a budget to follow. So why should we be any different and not accept our limits? Defiance and abhorring limits or boundaries are two outstanding characteristics of the addict. Accepting my comfortable means and developing a real gratitude for those means has led to great inner peace, Whereas in my prior life nothing was ever enough and there was no peace. I look at the clarity a budget provides as freedom, not limitations. For without that clarity, I'd be in debt and suffering and far from feeling free.

We can develop much happiness in life once we start practicing gratitude as Thoreau wrote: "I am grateful for what I am & have. My thanksgiving is perpetual. It is surprising how contended one can be with nothing definite - only a sense of existence." I discussed this subject in an earlier post "Grateful Just To Be." Would not every great man or woman that took a spiritual path be considered a failure if viewed in monetary terms alone without gratitude for the rest of their life? Was the Buddha, Jesus, Thoreau or Mother Teresa vastly rich? The Buddha a homeless beggar having to be fed by others with charity? No, the great spiritual practitioners of history would not be considered successes in monetary terms. They were great success when it came to inner peace though.

Some people get the wrong idea that I am against money. No, I value money greatly, get all of it you can by legal, honorable and legitimate means. But also realize that money is only one part of the equation for living a good life. What I do guard against is turning money into a god and destroying ones life and the lives of others to get money by artificial means.

Money can buy a house, but not a home.
Money can buy a bed, but not sleep.
Money can buy a clock, but not time.
Money can buy a book, but not knowledge.
Money can buy food, but not an appetite.
Money can buy position, but not respect.
Money can buy blood, but not life.
Money can buy medicine, but not health.
Money can buy sex, but not love.
Money can buy insurance, but not safety.
You see, money is not everything

There is much more to living a serene, happy and balanced life than mere money. Money is nothing more than stored energy. Money is neither good or bad - it is people that do good or bad things with money. People also do good or bad things to 'get' money. This is where the addicts makes a major mistake with their recovery work - they refuse to balance their recovery needs with their own personal wants. A want and a need are quite different. Addicts many a time refuse to live within their comfortable means and try to attain money artificially by 'selling their soul' to get it. To most people 'means' refers to money, but when I refer to means, I am speaking about all of them; whether they be financial means, spiritual means, capability means, energy means, mental or stress means, caloric means, health means, comfortable space means, time means and most important my recovery program means. We each have different means or capabilities in each area, so don't be concerned with what 'he, she or they' can do, just be mindful of what YOU can abstinently, soberly, solvently and comfortably do.

One of the biggest breakthroughs in my recovery was to learn to accept Gods / Higher Powers will and to live within my means. If my comfortable earning potential is low, I live within it. If it was high, I'd do the same. I was always wanting to live the bigshots life, but only had below average capabilities in that department. Once I accepted my natural and authentic life I could be at peace with who I was instead of basing my peace on trying to be someone I'm not able to be. All it took was my acceptance of my comfortable capabilities and acceptance to live at peace and with gratitude for my current surroundings. Sure, I can stress myself out, push things to make more bucks, but my recovery programs will suffer. I've found that an addict doesn't dictate to their addiction how much money they wants to make. The addiction does the dictating to the addict with how much, money he can comfortably earn and still maintain abstinence and sobriety. A lot of so called 'unederearners' in Debtors Anonymous have no concept of this. They say they want to make 'X' amount of money to pacify their ego, but do not take their comfortable 'un-drugged' earning capabilities into account. This concept of 'program comfort' not only goes with jobs, it goes with every other aspect of my life. I discussed this in an earlier post "Concept of Forcing Things."

I was talking with a lawyer the other day. He was a millionaire and had a nice penthouse office with big leather tufted upholstered chair and a secretary to fetch his coffee and donuts all day. He was grossly fat and had hard time breathing as he wheezed and coughed. He also had a badly swollen leg that might need amputation from diabetes and poor circulation. As he recalled all his projects to me I could see why he was in so poor physical shape. He had no shortage of business ventures, he was in automobile dealerships, real estate develop, metallurgy and reclamation, venture capital loans as well as his law practice. He was all about making money, but was bankrupt when it came to healthy living practices. It did not sink in to him that sitting on your butt all day, smoking, drinking coffee, getting stressed out and eating junk foods is not healthy living no matter how much money you make. No matter how 'rich' a person is they cannot pay their butler to eat healthy foods for them or do ones exercises and sweat for them. We are all on equal ground in this area. I discussed this in detail in my earlier post "The King and Queen of Good Health" When I write about BALANCED LIVING, this lawyer is a textbook example of UNBALANCED living. I tried to plant some seeds in him through living a life of voluntary simplicity, healthy eating and exercise. You know what he told me? He said he had too many bills to slow down and had no time for exercise. Oh well, all I can do is plant seeds in others...I can't force them to sprout. Being a millionaire wasn't enough for the lawyer, he still had 'poorness' consciousness.Thoreau once said: "a man is rich in proportion to the number of things he can afford to leave alone." This millionaire was much too busy to live right. He reminded me of a quote from Ruskin.

"In a shipwreck, one of the passengers fastened a belt about him with one hundred pounds of gold in it, with which he was afterwards found at the bottom. Now, as he was sinking--had he the gold? Or had the gold him?"

I took some time off after I left that meeting to go trail running. I am most grateful and rich for having such wilderness just 15 minutes away. As I relaxed after my run near a small waterfall and listened to the birds sing I gave thanks for my two good legs, my health and for the clean air and luscious green nature that surrounded me.


Take Care,
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Mills75
 
  1  
Reply Sun 9 Oct, 2005 09:12 pm
I applaud your personal insight, but there seems to be some confusion of terms. Spiritual poverty is "poorness" as "state of mind," and you've certainly a good perspective from which to approach this problem. However, economic poverty is "poorness" as state of material reality. Try telling parents struggling to keep a roof over their children's heads or clothes on their backs that "poorness is a state of mind." Try telling the starving children that "poorness is a state of mind." The Buddha, Jesus, and Thoreau relied on the generosity of others after they'd found their spiritual and philosophical callings, but their lives were founded on positions of relative privilege--their lives did not begin in want.

I believe I realize the purpose of your post and can appreciate the sentiment. However, without clarification it runs the risk of being little more than mental masturbation unfettered by the demands of the reality lived by billions.
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spendius
 
  1  
Reply Mon 10 Oct, 2005 03:30 am
Mr Mills think the post is elitist which it obviously is.
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Merry Andrew
 
  1  
Reply Mon 10 Oct, 2005 03:47 am
To discuss this with any objectivity, one must first define "poorness."
0 Replies
 
Green Witch
 
  1  
Reply Mon 10 Oct, 2005 09:38 am
VFR has written a number of preachy posts like this. He has proven the old saying "there is nothing worse than a reformed anything".
0 Replies
 
Chai
 
  1  
Reply Mon 10 Oct, 2005 10:16 am
I dunno, I don't think it's preachy or elitist.

I like the stuff vfr writes.

Makes me feel good, and centers me. Puts things in prespective.

It helps him to write it, and it may help someone who needs to read it.

Like Thoreau, he's marching to his own drummer.
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