dlowan wrote:"Deb, You asked, Do you have ideas about how you came to be what you are, then?"
Damned if I know.
Well, some of it I prolly DO know.....
A lot of my anxiety "scratchiness" and hyperarousal (of the anxious, hardwired kind, not THAT kind!!!) is very early trauma based, and learned (from me father).
Voice.......me mummy.
Sense of humour....THERE's a mystery.
I don't recall, really, any genuine humour from my father, or his side of the family, or much from my mother. Her side of the family have humour, but of a very different, practical jokey, kind. I think it is manic defence and learned and because of my verbal strengths.
Love of books.....father. And, from both parents reading to us. Also, my father and mother both nurtured as far as they were able my thirst for information. Very lucky there.
Had some lovely neighbour women, one especially, who was very loving and nurturing, intellectually so, too.
My sister was very loving.
A couple of brilliant teachers....and a number who gave me lots of encouragement for my English skills.
I feel kind of like a changeling, too, except my cousins from my favourite aunt are very ALIVE and emotionally generous. Very different people from me with very different interests, but intensely alive. But I hardly ever saw them...
Deb, Tres interesting. My father read to me a lot. And took me to the library when I was very young. I guess my bookishnish derives from that.
Sense of humor? Neither of my parents were big in that respect. Maybe from being smart. Not sure.
I too had some wonderful teachers. I especially remember my first grade teacher! She was wonderful. I'll always love her.
Just got off the phone with my first cousin (on my mother's side). We're very different. But he's the closest thing I'll ever have to a brother. He spent the last few minutes of the conversation telling me to be positive. See the sunny side. At first I tried to explain to him that it's not in my nature to be that way. "Well, change your nature," says he. "Huh?" wonders I. Then I just went along. Why fight it? He doesn't get it. But we love each other. He wants me to be happy and healthy and feel good. That's enough.
