Posted elsewhere and shamelessly re-posted here.
You all know I am set in my ways, so I guess this should come as no surprise. I awoke this morning to discover I had become a fossil. Snivel.
this is so hard to admit. Then I emailed all my friends and this is what they said:
Joe Sixpack wrote:
Set here fer a while and I'll pop ya a brewski, neo.
The nation of Fossilonia was said to have occupied an area of Asia Minor between a rock and a hard place. Concrete evidence is lacking, however.
I once knew a fossil named Morris
Who'd been eaten by tyrannosaurus
And while he was restin
Within the intestine
He thought of this poem just to bore us.
The fossilized remains of petrified geezers have been found in excavations from the Alzheimoic era, which corresponds with the first known appearance of the shrinkosaur. . .
Joe Nay Shonuf wrote:
You're just stonewalling us, neo.
Joe (Gravel in my gut) Nay Shonuf
real smart wrote:
God's will is mysterious and set in stone.
fossilized imposter wrote:
What should we have expected from such an inflexible God? I hate this.
Fossils are peaceful rocks. Fossils don't attack each other. Fossils don't develop weapons of mass destruction.
tim baldeagle wrote:
This is a perfect example of argumentum ad fossilarium.
my porsche wrote:
Just because you believe you are a fossil does not mean that fossils exist.
Phee nix zip wrote:
There could be worse things. You could be a green fossil.
xing xing wrote:
Fossilization is necessary in the progression of the soul to the light. Next will be a cocoon like state after which you will emerge as a, er, well, we really don't know.
Frank da pisa wrote:
You idiot! Now your body has taken after your petrified brain. What did you expect, you $%$ $#@* %^shole?
Steve as HUH? wrote:
I do not know if your affliction is truly an affliction. I will hit you with this stick. If it breaks, you are a fossil. Hey! Come back here!
In tree pod wrote:
When the species of a being is not clear to you, look at his friends.
There are many strata of fossils; Therefore, you exist.
Mo Momma wrote:
I'm sorry if I somehow caused you to fossilize. I can't imagine how, but if there's anything I can do . .
ShyABrick AleHounder wrote:
Fossilization is simply another manifestation of the threefold nature of dweeb.
What I need to know is: Am I normal?
Oh; and what did you think this was about?