Overweight

bundle up the kids and the dog (if you have one?) and go for a walk,
walking is great, and a good fun way to get the weight off.

Taking family walks sounds like a superb idea to me. My father wanted to exercise more, had difficultly finding time. I go jogging every night and forced him to come along at least a few times a week- now it's just routine, finding time isn't so hard.

Also, if you say she practically doesn't have a life of her own, maybe you could try to find time to do a few more little things to make her life easier, give her a little time to relax? If she's the one making dinner, maybe a few nights a week you could take over that- that's also good for planning really healthy meals, a good first step in the right direction.

Not being overly critical and insulting makes a huge difference; that's stressful and usually only makes people less likely to change. But instead of saying nothing, maybe a few compliments here and there might boost her self confidence.

I think taking her out somewhere, dinner, movies, museum, anything really, just some her and you time would be a lovely way to show you care. Besides, if she's around the kids all day, a break from that can be nice.

Those are just suggestions, I obviously know very little about your relationship, but I hope all goes well for you two (and the kids, of course).

Roofingguy - can you get someone else to take care of the kids for a couple of hours, once or twice a week? Maybe make a plan for the two of you to walk together - ride bikes - go to a gym together. Let her know it's cuz you want to spend time together - first and foremost. Fitness may just sneak up on both of you.

Good luck.

LOL yeah that makes sense...take her to the 'Gym' Im sure she will think its only to spend quality time with you....not!

You must be near some parks RG take a ball and kick it around with your family even, would she be into something different like Tennis or squash?
Make it your idea and say you dont want to go by yourself?
or go to a fair or something similar where you have to walk around all day looking at things, flower shows is she into that?
There are tons of things to do, for the family in a physical sense.

Fitness, IMO is 3 parts: 1 part mindset, one part physical exercise and 1 part proper food intake.

I guarantee that she can lose weight by altering all three, but she can also begin making baby steps by watching what and how much she eats.
Full time parents don't have a lot of time on their hands to prepare fancy healthy meals, so the best thing to do is look at what high calorie/high fat/low nutrition foods or beverages you can both omit from your diet ie: soda/carbonated beverages, non-real fruit drinks, potato chips, general "snack" foods.

Then begin assessing what you can incorporate to fill that void so you don't completely shock your systems (notice I'm pluralizing everything--you need to be on board with her, and the kids, otherwise it'll fail instantly). Then begin watching daily caloric intake. you can easily find what those values should be foir you age, height and weight in the net.

To couple your new diet with proper exercise will essentially double your results. If you're eating right and exercising...even as little as a 1/2 hour walk, you'll start to see changes.
Make it family time. Get the family together and discuss you days, plan a weekend away, or just have a heart to heart. Play frisbee, basketball, or something that fools you into exercising.
Once thee things become easier, then try more elaborate things...walk up a long flight of stairs, jog, join a gym.

The important thing here is to not target her and single her out as the one needing changes...after all, you're no Stallone either.
And for God's sake, apologize to her in a meaningful way for the things you've said. You two need to make a lifestyle change...and with it, I can almost guarantee, will come a relationship change. Do it together and do it for one another. Putting it off wiill just make getting it done that much more difficult.