@oralloy,
Please excuse what seems like a rehash, as I see the thread had progressed.
Aspergers isn't a developmental issue, as there are plenty of highly intelligent people with it. It is definitely a wiring issue, but often not a particularly problematic one. Refusing to grow also isn't being developmentally disabled - it is refusing to grow. Many adults slow down on this after around the 40 year mark. But there is definitely a reason for sadness when someone ardently refuses to grow.
Your issue isn't being developmentally challenged - it is that you are smart enough to grow, and dogedly choose not to. You can't grow by forcefully burying your head in the sand.