Hi

Hey, Squinney! have BPB record a version of mother in law for WolfMom

<I've got an earworm of it now>

I am very sorry for you loss Shewolf but I am very glad to hear from you. Best wishes.

Oh jesus lord. Man, shewolf, what **** to go through, everything, all these big bodies of sadness and grief and anger and skeletons in the closet. That must be hard to deal with. I'm sorry about your grandma. And about your MIL and the house and I'm sorry for Mr. Wolf. He must be having a tortured time losing his grandma and then dealing with all this out in the open. Good for him for confronting her though. Courageous man. And he's lucky to have you. You must be of tremendous help. The two of you got something strong going I think. And dont you worry about what that woman thinks of you lowly: you're the hero in his life, she's the one who failed. Betrayed him. He must feel so, vulnerable. Good thing you're together. And are getting out of there. Dealing with her can come later. When she faces up to ****.

Take care shewolf ... be sure to get up for air regularly.

Whew! Ditto what everyone else has said, Shewolf. I'm glad you're back but I'm sorry about the hell you've been going through and will continue to go through for a while. May your grandma rest in peace and may you MIL find a way to bury her sorrows elsewhere. I hope you find a lovely place for the three of you real soon.

I am so terribly sorry for your loss, shewolf and to hear of your troubles. I know how very painful life can be sometimes and my heart goes out to you.

I am relieved to see that you are ok as everyone else here is as well.

(((((Hugs))))) to you little sister

I am really sorry for your loss Shewolf.
Good to see you back with us.

<exhales sigh of relief and turns up Seasons>

Sorry to hear, Shewolf.

Oh wow, there you are, shewolf! Thank heavens you're alright! (relatively speaking) I'm so glad you didn't fall off the edge of the world.

I'm sorry you're having to go through such a bad time right now. But don't think for a minute that you're all alone...you've got a bunch of people here that can help you get through it. We will. Promise. Now, go kiss that baby and tell her everything's gonna be alright.

And please, don't go to any expense finding a container for the evil-mother-in-law-from-hell. Just stick her in one of those clear plastic cups like they use for fish in the pet stores. You can poke a couple of holes in the lid for air.......or not.

If you need any more good ideas for dealing with her, I'm sure Montana and I can come up with a few doozies.

I'm sorry that life for you has been so tough of late, Shewolf.

Blue--?
you would FEED her? That does it, I am not selling her to you. You are too nice. ;-)

Thank you all for the kind words. It helps to hear/read other things about me despite of the venomous sh*t MIL offers.
As for Mr Wolf.. yeah, he has it really bad right now. Some of wich I can not comprehend... ! One of the things that I heard between those two was how MIL allowed his father to strip his clothes, empty his room , lock him inside , tie the door with a jump rope and remove the curtains so everyone in the apt complex could see how stupid he looked. Mr Wolf was 7 years old at the time........ it makes me sick to look at mil. Of course, I was not there. I can not judge/condemn the woman, but as a mother, that man would have been shot. If Mr Wolf ever did that to Bean, I would take her and run as far as my short legs would allow. I dont understand how a mom can allow things like that to happen in front of her to her child. But , that isnt for me to understand I guess. And having heard these things, I now completely understand WHY living here has been so hard for them, me and all of us on many diffrent levels. Thier history is jagged, harsh, and out of control. They have not mended thier lives and in a desperate attempt to soothe each other in thier grief, decided to live together. Well.. OBVIOUSLY that was the wrong thing to do!! hahah!
Sometimes I truly feel like the lights of the house will come on full blast, and there in the middle of the room will stand Jerry Springer with his microphone! I have never been in the midst of so much drama in my life! I as a person am very quiet, low key, peaceful person. When I argue.. if at all, I dont yell, I dont scream and I dont throw stones. I believe that we are a product of our surroundings and we are responsible for the energy we live in. This household is distrubing to me . I have tense shoulders all day. I am rigid, I grind my teeth... things I have never done before I am now doing. I am ill-equipped to handle this tension and am suffering because of it. My biggest fear is that Bean will become accustom to this tension, and later on as an adult try to re create this atmosphere because that is what felt normal to her as she was growing up. I know this is just a mommy fear, probally unrealistic, but it is there.
Im afraid also, that when we DO move, MIL will attempt to follow. Either playing the " im desperatly alone " card, or the " I want to see my granddaughter" card. Either one will be a ploy to try to move in , or drown herself in OUR lives. I have a feeling that this wont be over even when we do get out. >sigh<
But, I will cross that bridge when I get there. Right now I need to focus on getting a home . As I type here, I have another site up taking virtual tours of homes in our area and even glancing at apartments.
Thank you for giving me the room to just vent, cry, and say some pretty awful things with out judging me. I have been in front of a judge for the past year and a half ( mil ) and it feels nice to be able to just say what I want with out there really being any meaning. Truthfully I would never hurt MIL< but DAMN if I dont fantasize about it!!!!!!
Mayo jar? PPbbbtth.. I will lock her in a 20 year old dirty port-o-potty and turn the damn thing upside down!
GGGGRrrrrrrrrR!!

Yippee! Even if it's a shoebox, it's temporary and will be more comfortable than where you are now.



I think we had more fun thinking of ways to cage her than you did...

I can think of many way to cage her,
but then people would become scared of me....

Uh, Montana and I will just slink back into our corners now. I can see you don't need any help with ideas! THAT was a GREAT one!!! Except that from what you've said, she's already full of sh!t.

That is just unbelievable that she would allow her son to be emotionally tortured like that. I am reeling....

RUN.

And don't leave a forwarding address.

I mean it. Jillybean doesn't need a grandmother like that around.

That is my thought. Bean doesnt need to learn those kinds of things are ok. And if gramma isnt woman enough to stand up for her own child, HEAVEN FORBID, anything happen to bean where she needs to stand up for her because she wouldnt.
I dont know where her jelly back bone came from but Im sick of it. Bean doesnt need to learn that and Mr Wolf doesnt need to be subjected to it anymore.
Beyond anything else, I cant believe she allowed that to happen. After mr wolf asked her WHY she let those things happen to him, her responce was " Oh my gosh, that was terrible for you. But I loved him!!!"

Im glad this is coming to an end and we are getting out in a shorter time then before, but damn it sure took a lot to get this started. Mr Wolf was really hanging on to the idea that he could have a relationship with his mother by living with her.... unfortunatly, that idea was shot to hell in a rather rude way.

( pssstt.. anyone know of any port-o-potties I can borrow? I promise I will return it!!! )

Ja... that upside-down port-o-potty was full of images!!!

Glad you've got your ol' kick ass attitude back.


No forwarding address is good... v. good. (Except for us. Please be sure to leave that & your last name with somebody, OK?)

Definition of mixed emotions :-

Watching your Mother in Law drive your brand new car over a cliff.

Unfortunately, sometimes the only thing you can do to rid your life of dysfunction is to eliminate the cause of it.

The woman gives motherhood a bad name. I cannot believe she didn't even apologize to Mr. Wolf when given the chance! That would have been the last straw for me.

A mother's first allegiance is NOT to her husband, but to her child. Get that straight. A husband can look out for himself. A child can't. And if it's own mother won't stand up for it, for God's sake who will defend it?

None of you...not you, Mr. Wolf OR Jillybean...needs this woman around. Particularly the Bean. Better no grandmother than one that gives her such a skewed example of "love." My son has no living grandparents, and he's just fine. Don't worry about that, shewolf. Worry more about the damage she can do.

After everything he's been through, Mr. Wolf deserves some peace. The best thing you can do for all three of you is to find a place where you can live peaceably. That is what you deserve, and what Jillybean deserves to grow up with. It's best to cut ties with old destructive patterns and let them die out on their own. Let the sins of the past stay in the past. Don't let them move in with you again. You don't need them in your present and future.

(((BIG HUGS TO WOLF FAMILY)))

Very true Eva.. and well said ;-)

As an adult, I have to fight back this horrible raging judgemental behavior I see seeping out twords her after hearing that. But, as a person I feel she deserves it... ( ug ) I just have to remember it isnt my place to deliver just rewards and that my judgements hold no power over her . Hard place to be as I feel I need to save mr wolf, defend him, and give him the sense of closure he was hoping for from her... but again, that plight doesnt belong to me.


-----Unfortunately, sometimes the only thing you can do to rid your life of dysfunction is to eliminate the cause of it. -----

I dont think MIL will ever speak to me again after the pot o potty trick!
Aside from that, Mr and I have discussed moving to New Mexico. MIL can plan her trips there to see Bean and since she will be on MY turf, she will behave appropriatly or I shall see her to the door.
Safest thing between evil and peace is distance.
800 miles sufficient?

Buy somewhere with a moat and a drawbridge.