Im sat here with a copy of the Bible..

C,mon, Im sat here waiting with anticipation!!!

Heres some lovely lines to get you going which I found last night-

For I am sick of love
His left hand is under my head
And his right hand doth embrace me

I thinkith that I shall leavith this threadith alone.

Sorry MG, I couldn't resist. I'm not religious, so I hosestly can't add anything.

Revelation 13:18

Me neither but I think its worth a look.
It has some quite nice little ditties but havnt actually got into a story yet.

Start at the beginning and go until you get to the end. Really. If for no other reason than to say you did it.

Isn't there a passage in Leviticus that reads...."And the asseth runneth througheth the desert for 40 days and 40 nights untilith it was too damn tired to moveth any moreth"

That was always one of my favotire passages.

Bella-I started to read it when I was about 12(part of my Madonna fascination and wanting to become a nun)I found there were too many 'and x begat x, and x begat x...'.It went on for ages.

Debra-Here is wisdom.Let him that hath understanding count the number of the beast:for it is the number of a man;and his number is six hundred threescore and six.

I am the beast they speak of.

Ha ha. That sounds very familiar.

I like to read the words in red in the new testament (being sure to skip all the other parts).

Revelations is fun to read when you're doing mushrooms.

...and it was probably written in the same state.

Freeduck, do you mean doing mushrooms in a lightly garliced melted butter sauce?

Sadly my copy is void of colour.The printers probably thought it may be racist.

Really? I thought it was standard policy to put Jesus's words in red in the new testament. Oh well.

Wow, a colour coded Bible, do you think theyd do a pop up version?

Ok, for all people who think sex is a sin, page 2 he says re men and women-And God Blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth.

God just made woman from mans rib..'And they were both naked, the man and his wife,and they were not ashamed'.

So, it says they were man and wife but at no point did it mention a wedding ceremony.
Being naked is ok!!!!

Philippians 4:6-8

THAT SERPENT HAS ALOT TO ANSWER TO!!!!!!

Can you believe he tricked 'Eve' in to eating an apple from the knowledge tree of good and evil, 'Adam ate it too' but God punishes 'Eve'!!'Unto thy woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow tho shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he sjhall rule over thee.'
God then says Adam must continuously eat from the tree of knowledge until he returns tothe ground.

How unfair is that!!
What gender was the serpent??

Intrepid-
Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your request be known unto God.And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep yuor hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.

Here's a bit that is appropriate to the season.....

Psong 58

O Money, I have had no choice but to turn myself in to the police. O bitter day!
2 But what is on me to do when he is being chased by murderous Italians with machine guns? Who can one buy that has more machine guns than Italians?
3 O why would anyone ever have outlawed spirits? Such fools to open such a huge avenue for the ambitions of Italians!
4 O Money, do you know anything about the internal revenue service? They have asked for an interview with me tomorrow.
5 Do you happen to know anyone in the internal revenue service? Do any of your followers work there?

Psong 59

Who are the whining idiots who cast up this fraudulent image of the Antichrist, and describe him as the chief enemy of mankind? Have they never heard of the beast incarnate called the Internal Revenue Service?
2 O Money, these fiends from hell are your sworn enemy. There is nothing they would not do to remove you from the pockets of your followers.
3 O Money, I beseech you to call upon all the powers at your disposal, and to blast these nightmare creatures into everlasting penury and ruin.
4 O Money, I am being indicted. O Money, I shall be sent to prison.
5 O Money. Why me?