Within ten years, DNA testing will make it easy and
trivial (approximately $29 for the sequence reduction)
to establish exactly who has been directly descended
and in all rights belonging, to the family of
Richard Leakey's Australopithecus.
3.2 million years is an awfully long time to
miss your family.
A company (not necessarily named Lucy
in the Sky, Inc.) will then petition and create a
governmentally recognized minority, numbering in
the millions, known as Euro-Lucesians.
There will be tax-deductions and diplomas involved but mostly,
there will be free steak and adequate beer for the growing political
party of Those-Who-Walk-Uprightists.
Over time, their only true competition within the U.S. Senate
will be the long-revered Those-With-Opposable-Thumbs,
led by a slow but powerful family from the tar pits of Texas.
Yeah, don't believe me? Try reading Everyone Loves Lucy
It's been scientifically documented.
. . . The genes. Protect your oldest graveyards because
the scientists are on their way!
The Huns will rue their 15 minutes of fame,
and concede the Minority Semi-Finals before the first quarter
is over. Lucite is not just a trademark, but an ethnological
discovery and popular image that Richard Leakey (poor bastard)
failed to market, deploy and capitalize upon.
Uh . . . either that, or I switched channels and got confused.
NewSig: If you could copyright confusion, with royalties, . . . Man! THAT'S evolution.