Help me combat a gardening terrorist.

get her one of those electric dog collars and every time she goes near your plants, zap her. :wink:

I am feeling particularly evil today....

Purple water colors.
Purple leaves look unnatural, she may think twice about picking them?

Bella -

ooo, a real solution...manure? Could you put manure around them? She might think twice about digging around in poop.

Hmm, no.
If she is scrounging for plants and leaves to make natural mulch, she will steal the poop. Guarantee ya.

Get one of those motion activated sprinklers. It'll keep her, and dogs and cats away and provide you with hours of entertainment.

good one cjhsa!

Too close to the path to use those sprinklers.

I've tried reasoning, but the senility factor kicks in ( hers, not mine).

You could just stand out there and spray her with the hose.

When the apt manager went out to have a word with her about these activities she threw her shovel in her general direction. On another occasion she wrapped her hands about the manager's throat. And, strangely, the old lady is allowed to keep it up.

Call the cops and tell them the old lady downloads child porn. That'll work.

No computer.

pee on them,
when she is looking...

> blush <

Contact your local Agency for Aging (blue pages in the phone book) and ask for advice. If someone is taking an official interest, the woman's children might start working on a timetable.

Her behavior indicates that she's becoming a clear and present danger to herself and others.

Her relatives are converting their garage into a home for her. They know she is in need of care. If only they'd speed it up. I don't dislike her, understand. I often converse with her, getting some bizarre feedback. She was telling me of pink and green snakes flying in the air, descending on cows and strangling them.

We had a similar case last year. A woman taking her meds, then drinking like a fish. Her son the cop moved her in, then promptly left her on her own. She began by reporting snakes in the kitchen (they were small beads of roach poison run under the counters). Then it was the people upstairs were stalking her. No matter where she moved to, "they" followed her, even the cat. She soon concluded that the lovely young woman living up there was in fact a man. She also objected to her neighbor's dress. Each time the neighbor left for her teaching job the old lady stood near the door and said, "Just look at yourself." Then she decided that the upstairs people were using their remotes to click her television, air conditioner, etc., on and off at will. They began bombarding her by "sending needles through the ceiling." Finally, the old lady couldn't take it anymore and she moved out. A few months later she stopped by to say that her former upstairs neighbors had followed her and moved over her to resume the stalking. Oddest thing here, her son knows all this, but does not involve himself.

She talked to you about pink snakes strangling invisible cows and also has tried to strangle the landlord? Eeeyikes. You be careful around her.

You could dig up your bulbs and put them in a large pot... then put a small pyracantha in there with 'em. Those are so thorny and stay green all the time so she'd be unlikely to want to handle it or think it was mulch.

Edgar, is that peyote you're growing there?

I don't make em up, just report em.