@dlowan,
dlowan wrote:Dunno.
I used to start a lot of threads at one point.
Mighta missed it in the haze....
Could be, but by a preliminary check I just did, it seems we really didn't run into each other much in 2003. It may seem strange to me today, but we really didn't in the early years.
dlowan wrote:Can you say how and in what way it changed your attitude?
Well, Hesse's most immediate effect was to reassure me in who I was. "Aha, I'm not the only one who loves the learning part of school and hates the social part of it. Hesse went through the same thing in
Unterm Rad." Or, "aha, Harry Haller in
Steppenwolf feels the same way I do about music, and around attractive women. I'm not the only one." (These are just two out of many examples.) Being an outsider in my social life, I was very relieved by such assurance.
The most recent specific difference Hesse made in my life was when I lost my job. If I hadn't had read Hesse, I would have been much more predisposed to freak out about it, especially since it happened at the beginning of a severe recession. Instead, all I feel is a sense of fatalist serenity and of moving on to the next thing in my life, the nature of which I will figure out in due time. Hesse's poem
Stufen (Steps) perfectly describes my current state of mind about where I am in my life.
This translation by Walter Aue isn't perfect, but still captures the essence:
Like ev'ry flower wilts, like youth is fading
and turns to age, so also one's achieving:
Each virtue and each wisdom needs parading
in its own time, and must not last forever.
The heart must be, at each new call for leaving,
prepared to part and start without the tragic,
without the grief - with courage to endeavor
a novel bond, a disparate connection:
for each beginning bears a special magic
that nurtures living and bestows protection.
We'll walk from space to space in glad progression
and should not cling to one as homestead for us.
The cosmic spirit will not bind nor bore us;
it lifts and widens us in ev'ry session:
for hardly set in one of life's expanses
we make it home, and apathy commences.
But only he, who travels and takes chances,
can break the habits' paralyzing stances.
It even may be that the last of hours
will make us once again a youthful lover:
The call of life to us forever flowers...
Anon, my heart! Do part and do recover!
(I took the liberty of correcting one reference.)