The Prison Thread. Where A2Kers go to discuss jail time.

I might just come down to your town, Eva. Just to drive around on garbage day and take $20 bills off the garbage bags.

Let's see, if 5 animals die per week, according to my calculations that would be $100 profit.

A tidy sum.

Of course, I'll have to figure out how much gas will cost, and the wear and tear on my tractor.

My husband says you can also leave a sixpack of cold beer on top of anything you want hauled off. Works just as well as 20 bucks, and it's cheaper.

Not only could you pick up some easy cash, but you could get drunk while doing it.

What the hell am I doing telling you that?!!!

Gus, no wonder everyone loves you so much. Not a day goes by, that you don't bring laughter into someones heart.

Gus, have you tried putting the premium-job gas in your tractor?

World of difference. I'll so far to say you can get that pup rocking up to at least 13mph with the high-octane.

Naa slappy. I think he uses fuel he made out of potato starch.

Cav, if I remember rightly, I was not the only one. Cheque mate.


The Gustavratzenhofer story reminds me of the time I went to call on him. I knocks on the door, a small kid opens the door, I asked where Gustavratzenhofer was. The kid didn't say a word and just pointed to the garage.

I goes round and opens the door and finds Gustavratzenhofer with a goat!! Completely flabbergasted, I slams the door shut and flies out and yells, "Do you know Gustavratzenhofer's with a goat? Do you know what they're doing? Doesn't this bother you?" To which the little kid replied, "Ba a a a ah!"

All characters are fictitious to protect the kid.


Ossobucodo, do you have blond hair?
I only ask because a cute blonde became so sick of hearing blonde jokes that she had her hair cut and dyed brown. A few days later, as she was out driving around the countryside, she stopped her car to let a flock of sheep pass.

Admiring the cute wooly creatures, she said to the farmer called Gustavratzenhofer, "If I can guess how many sheep you have, can I take one?"

Gustavratzenhofer, always the gentleman, said, "Sure!"

The blonde thought for a moment and, for no discernible reason, said, "352."

This being the correct number, Gustavratzenhofer was, understandably, totally amazed, and exclaimed, "You're right! O.K., I'll keep to my end of the deal. Take your pick of my flock."

The blonde carefully considered the entire flock and finally picked the one that was by far cuter and more playful than any of the others.
When she was done, Gustavratzenhofer turned to her and said, "O.K., now I have a proposition for you. If I can guess your true hair color, can I have my sheep dawg back?"

All characters are fictitious to protect a national dish. :wink:

god, you're good at this stuff...

two and a bit years since the last post

dang guy still makes me laugh

This thread still alive? You're a miracle worker, ehBeth, for resuscitating it.