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Boyfriend has been acting distant and not attracted to me since I've been pregnant

 
 
Reply Mon 25 Sep, 2017 09:53 pm
My boyfriend and I are expecting a baby in a couple months and within the last 7ish months we have maybe had sex ten times if that . Sex of course isn't everything, but he is just acting all around distant . We are usually a very sexually involved couple , he used to cuddle a lot more , kiss me , etc . He constantly turns me down , which he never would before . I'm starting to think it's not just because I'm pregnant . I have recently caught him messaging several girls and getting attention elsewhere . I also have noticed that he watches a lot more porn . I've never been the type to feel insecure like I do now , but the more distant he becomes , the worse I feel . What should I do ? Has he lost interest in me ? I'm expecting soon and I feel like I'm wasting my time with someone that doesn't act attracted to me. Everytime I talk to him about it he gets upset and tells me that he is attracted and that nothing has changed.
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Type: Discussion • Score: 1 • Views: 1,305 • Replies: 6
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jespah
 
  2  
Reply Tue 26 Sep, 2017 05:49 am
@Khocquard,
Do you take him with you to your appointments? Take him the next time and bring up with your doctor about sex during pregnancy. He might think he can't or not get the mechanics or think he will hurt you or the baby. The doctor has heard this question a thousand times before and can address it.
Khocquard
 
  1  
Reply Tue 26 Sep, 2017 06:07 am
@jespah,
Yes , he knows that it's safe and okay. Just the fact that he barely even cuddles or shows affection is another thing . If he at least did those things I wouldn't be so worried.
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tibbleinparadise
 
  1  
Reply Tue 26 Sep, 2017 06:09 am
@Khocquard,
He may be straight up scared about the prospects of being a dad. How old are you guys and are there any other kids?
Khocquard
 
  1  
Reply Tue 26 Sep, 2017 06:56 am
@tibbleinparadise,
24 and 25 and this is our first child
tibbleinparadise
 
  1  
Reply Tue 26 Sep, 2017 09:07 am
@Khocquard,
I'm not defending his behavior (disclaimer)

I am going to assume that this pregnancy was not planned. For a young guy, becoming a parent, especially if he wasn't planning on it, feels like the end of the world. He's faced with either giving up a lot of his ways and settling down, or giving up a chunk of his paycheck for child support. Either way he looses.

There IS a decent enough chance that once the baby comes and is an actual, physical thing, he may settle.
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Alpha-1
 
  2  
Reply Tue 26 Sep, 2017 10:57 am
Pregnancy is a big change for everyone. Hormone's can actually increase the women's sex drive and guys reactions can range from scared to turned on by it. Just because he's been told he won't hurt the baby doesn't mean he's not tentative. Maybe tryout some new lingerie and if all else fails, talk to him. Communication is key.
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