Remote desktop/program sharing

Download VNC works great and it's free. Just do a google for VNC and you'll find the website to download it.

Midnight

well i and a friend have installed it, although the documentation doesn't seem to be that clear on how to give eachother mutual sharing, i made an authentication password, so did he, i added his ip as a client for my server, he did likewise for me, and yet when i try to connect and it says attempting to connect, it always times out, even though my firewall is off, any idea why?

youd both need to install servers and clients

a simple step by step (includes setting up ssh encryption)
http://pigtail.net/LRP/vnc/

Id also use a rule based firewall to limit access to just each others IP addressthere are quite a few freeware rule based firewalls
I use Kerio Personal Firewall 2 (old freeware)

I use PcAnywhere

Well it seems this won't be the easy-going software that I can just tell a friend about and they'll be able to set it up without a fuss thanks for the input guys and your time merry christmas to whoever it may apply

and thats assuming static IPs
its even more fun with a dynamic IP on one or both ends

in which case youd need a Dynamic DNS service
luckily they are readily available for free
http://www.dyndns.org/

the OpenSSH encryption and firewall rules are an added level of security that does complicate it a bit
however its not past the ability of most people with those guides
firewall rule control varies but that also isnt that difficult
but your right its not really plug and play

Good Luck

If you've both got winXP you can use msn messenger to view and control each other's machines -

"Actions -> Ask for remote assistance"

That should do the trick for you.

PCAnywhere with its monthly costs is quite the ripoff, IMO.

Using VNC (or similar apps like RAdmin) over the Internet with dynamic IPs is, IMO, far too complicated to be practical for the average home user, though it may be appropriate for (and certainly easier to use with) home LANs.

Jer's suggestion to use MSN Messenger on Windows XP systems is a good one.

To add to it, I'll note that you don't need MSN Messenger to do it... The Remote Desktop Connection software MSN Messenger utilizes is pre-installed with Windows XP. To run it, click Start > All Programs > Accessories > Communications > Remote Desktop Connection. Note that both systems need to have Windows Messenger, which comes preloaded with XP, installed for it to work.

From Microsoft: Using Remote Assistance to Get Help When You Need It

Also note that although the link above says both computers need to be running XP, that is not the case. The client portion of Remote Desktop can be installed on all versions of Windows from Windows 95 up...

From Microsoft: Remote Desktop Connection Software Download