Reply
Tue 30 Nov, 2004 07:07 am
"O dust of earth, sit down on the dry ashes of our ancestors and consider love. "
BE PROUD
O dust, that you are responsible for the creation of love.
(If it were not for your lack, you would never know its reality!)
BE PROUD
O dust, of your lofty goals of peace through love.
(Your headlines scream its rancid failures.)
BE PROUD
O dust, your eyes can see the potential of love in others.
(Yet you ignore the source of love within.)
BE PROUD
O dust, that no one can call you a hypocrite for your display of "love".
(THIS is the reason the source of love within is silently staring at the heart of your soul.)
BE PROUD
O dust, you passed love onto little children.
(Countless are the tortured children because of broken, destroyed relationships.
Nice "love legacy", wouldn't you say?)
BE PROUD
O dust, of your weekly faithfulness worshipping your love for whatever you perceive a higher power to be.
(Redundancy, not even being tolerated by human beings, is quite annoying.)
BE PROUD
O dust, your love has not failed others.
(Your love has failed yourself.)
BE PROUD
O dust, you gained the truth of true love while sitting on the dry ashes of ancestors past.
(Who will be sitting upon your dried dust in the future?)
BE PROUD
O dust, you conquered the world.
(But yielded not unto true love to conquer your soul.)
BE PROUD
O dust, you humbly yielded to a world of "truisms."
(But yielded not your whole self unto that true love within you.)
BE PROUD
O dust, you comprehend fully what pride does and is.
(Its razored edge waits to cushion you when you land atop it.)
BE PROUD
O dust, of your constant awareness to persevere in pursuing happiness on earth while ignoring all else.
(The more you ignore God, the more God will ignore you.)
Wow, TM, this is quite exquisite! Has a 'classic' feel to it. I would remove the line breaks and squish it all together. Also, rather than using (parenthesis), just use italics. Well done, friend!
Thank you Kelly...
While it is true that my grammer and punctuation and perhaps my poetic rhythem may need editing (more than likely...), I'm pleased that my message gets through.
(It's .. uh...whatcha ma call it ... "poetic license"...??? hahahaha)
Thanks again.
tm
Myself, I possess a poetic license to kill :-)
Hmmmmm....Methinks thou possess daggers that sprew forth from thine lips, no?
(Have a great weekend)
tm