I am a woman. Does having sexual thoughts/imagining sexual acts with a woman make me a bisexual?

Reply Thu 29 Jun, 2017 03:41 pm
Hey folks,

I am on a journey of better self awareness and as I am new to understanding sexuality, I wanted to ask if anyone knows what makes someone a bisexual? I have always identified as a straight woman but have had sexual thoughts/imagined acts with a woman during masturbation but in real life I have no desire to be with a woman sexually or romantically. I've analysed my feelings in real life quite extensively and there just isn't anything there in terms of any feelings for real women i.e. Women I physically can see, not women I imagine/have thoughts about. Do my thoughts/imagination mean that I am bisexual and if so how would it work if I have no desire to be with any woman in real life at all?

I am not concerned with labels but rather developing a better understanding of myself and sexuality. Any input would be awesome.
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Reply Thu 29 Jun, 2017 03:51 pm
Reply Thu 29 Jun, 2017 04:09 pm
hmm...so being bisexual includes sexual thoughts/imaginations you have for the same gender during masturbation despite those thoughts and desires never translating to real bodies and real people? Interesting indeed.
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Reply Mon 17 Jul, 2017 07:29 am
Perhaps it's just fantasy. Maybe you're bicurious but are inhibited to experiment? For myself I'm a bisexual male that has only had sex with women but I often think of men when I masturbate. Under the right circumstance I would try sex with a man, however I do not have romantic feelings for men therefore I would not want a serious relationship with a man, you know, marriage. I still identify as bi.
Reply Thu 27 Sep, 2018 02:23 am
Hey. I am a woman and I feel the same way as you do. Like, I really want to have sex with a woman but I don't want to date or marry one. I haven't been with one so far and have only had sex with men. I am not concerned with labels. I like it this way. I love checking out women and at times, I really feel like going down on them. Yeah, I really want to do that someday but you know, I've realized that the women I check out, I want to do them but at the same time the ones I get attracted to, usually have a body, face or hair I'd love to have someday.
I am also a narcissist somewhere. I love checking my self out in the mirror and I sometimes get turned on by my own body. I wonder if some people feel the same way.
Anyway, I just wanted to share my thoughts. It's intriguing to retrospect and know more about yourself and your desires. But it's important to acknowledge them and not be ashamed. I'm actually in the process of embracing myself the way I am and it's not easy. I'd say I suffer from idealism. High expectations of myself and of people unfortunately and I fail miserably at achieving and getting them , both. Sexuality isn't a problem though, thankfully. I am happy to see that there are people who share the same thoughts and desires as me. Sucks being the only one thinking this way you know.
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Reply Thu 27 Sep, 2018 02:36 am
Hey. I feel in your case, wanting to have sex with a woman is more like a fantasy , the desire to simply experiment or that you like looking at another woman getting pleasure when having sex because perhaps, you don't get to see your own reactions while having sex,so maybe when you imagine yourself with another woman and see her reacting to sex in a passionate way like you probably do (it turns on both women and men alike when women moan and enjoy sex), you like it but it's just that and nothing else which may explain your not wanting to get or feeling the need to get involved physically or emotionally with a woman because just the imagination helps.

Another possible explanation could be that when women don't get the intimacy they want from men, they imagine getting that from women who'd understand them better.

You are pretty clear that you don't want to even get sexually involved with a woman for real. You are most probably bi curious, but definitely not bisexual.

It's good that you are not bothered with labels. Good luck on your quest to understand yourself better. Wish me luck for I am in the process as well.

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Reply Fri 7 Dec, 2018 02:31 am
yes, ofcouse
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