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Come back, Col Man! Who else gives us stuff like this?:

 
 
msolga
 
  1  
Reply Mon 22 Nov, 2004 06:24 am
Final fling
November 12, 2004

German police rescued a swimming pool attendant at a hen party after the bride-to-be tried to force him to have sex.

Bild said the bride told police she "wanted to fool around one last time before the wedding". She tricked the man into taking her into the lost property room at a pool in Schweinfurt, Bavaria.

"She locked the door and ... started trying to undress the man," Bild quoted a police spokesman as saying. The woman was freed and police decided not to reveal her identity so as "not to endanger future marital peace".
0 Replies
 
msolga
 
  1  
Reply Mon 22 Nov, 2004 07:38 am
Aussie saves Austrian opera
November 5, 2004

An Australian member of the audience leapt on stage to save an Austrian production of the opera Carmen after a leading character suffered a heart attack.

Melbourne baritone Ian Vayne went to the Landes Theatre in Linz last night to watch a friend star as Carmen and ended up receiving a standing ovation himself.

Vayne, who lives in Linz, played the role of matador Escamillo in Bizet's opera five months ago and when he went back stage to see his friend after the second act was told Lauri Vasar collapsed while playing the character.

"I told the stage manager I could sing if needed, and they agreed," Vayne said.

With 15 minutes to prepare and no time to warm up his vocal chords, in a shirt from lost property and a pair of old jackaroo boots, Vayne saved the show.

"He was amazing. There is a lot of dance in our production and he performed it flawlessly," said theatre spokeswoman Elisabeth Egger.

Producers said without Vayne, who studied at the Queensland Conservatorium and has performed at London's Royal Opera House in Covent Garden, they would have been forced to refund the 700 guests their ticket money.

Vasar, who doctors said had suffered a mild heart attack, was recovering.

AAP
0 Replies
 
Lady J
 
  1  
Reply Mon 22 Nov, 2004 06:40 pm
Tha's a very cool story, msolga! Very Happy
0 Replies
 
J-B
 
  1  
Reply Tue 23 Nov, 2004 03:56 am
thanks for your sincere effort to call COL back Smile

Hey Col!!!! where the hell you are going on??
0 Replies
 
msolga
 
  1  
Reply Tue 23 Nov, 2004 04:41 am
Yeah, Col, where on earth are you? Come back right away! You can do this stuff far better than we can!
0 Replies
 
cavfancier
 
  1  
Reply Tue 23 Nov, 2004 04:51 am
Three Wives Attempt Suicide After Argument
Nov 22, 9:14 AM (ET)

TEHRAN (Reuters) - All three wives of a 67-year-old Iranian man took overdoses in an unsuccessful triple suicide attempt after the youngest wife bought an expensive pair of boots, a news agency reported on Sunday.

"My two other wives were very jealous after my 27-year-old wife bought a pair of boots for $450," the husband was quoted as saying by the ISNA student news agency.

"After they had an argument about the price, they all attempted suicide together," he added.

All three women, now in stable condition in the hospital, have separate apartments and cars.

Men in Iran, where Islamic law has been in force since 1979, can marry up to four wives, although polygamy is fairly rare.


Elephant Cleared After Crushing Zoo Keeper
Nov 22, 9:29 AM (ET)

BEIJING (Reuters) - An elephant that stamped on his keeper at a Chinese zoo in the mating season and crushed him to death has been declared innocent because of mitigating circumstances, Xinhua news agency said on Sunday.

Hu Tianmin was cleaning the elephant house at the zoo in Kunming, capital of Yunnan province, in August when the five-ton, 20-year-old male Asian elephant named "Zhongbo" lifted him up, threw him to the ground and stamped on him.

"The production safety administration in Kunming confirmed that the victim was responsible for his own tragedy because he had entered the elephant pen all alone and without adopting any protective measures, in violation of zoo rules," Xinhua said.

Zoo officials said it was the mating season and the elephant was possibly suffering from sunstroke at the time, which made it irritable and prone to attack.

The general manager of the zoo and at least four officials in charge of security were penalized by the production safety administration, Xinhua said without giving details.

"Visitors and zookeepers have been advised not to get too close to the animals in future," it said.


They Don't Come Any Dumber...
Nov 22, 9:10 AM (ET)

SYDNEY (Reuters) - Bemused diners watched as three hapless thieves unsuccessfully tried to kick open a sliding door in a botched attempt to rob an Australian seafood restaurant, police said on Monday.

The men, wearing balaclavas, ran off empty-handed but left their bootprints on the industrial-strength glass door in a robbery bid that Australian Broadcasting Corp. radio said could have been mistaken as "a rehearsal for a slapstick comedy."

Police said about 20 diners watched as the men, one of whom was carrying a knife, tried to push open the door of the restaurant in the coastal village of Gerringong, 140 km (85 miles) south of Sydney, and then began kicking the glass.

"They're probably more dangerous because they're dumb," police investigator Jamie Williams said.

Restaurant owner Greg Moore said diners remained calm as they watched events unfold while enjoying dessert and coffee.

"The door's open, the sign says 'Slide' but obviously with their balaclavas they couldn't read too well," Moore said.

Diners were given complimentary bottles of wine after the bizarre episode. Police later found what they believe to be a stolen car used in the robbery attempt, and are continuing their investigations.
0 Replies
 
msolga
 
  1  
Reply Tue 23 Nov, 2004 05:03 am
The new spunky wife spent $450 on a pair of boots? Hey, I'm with the other two! (barefoot & oldish, most likely.) Evil or Very Mad

And I'm with the elephant, too! Twisted Evil

And, as for those heavy-footed thieves .....! Rolling Eyes Jeeze, they should take classes! How embarrassing!Rolling Eyes
0 Replies
 
msolga
 
  1  
Reply Tue 23 Nov, 2004 05:42 am
Hot to trot
November 23, 2004

A mayor who set up a direct hotline for people to call with civic problems is asking bored housewives to stop inviting him around for sex.

Cristian Anghel, Mayor of Baia Mare, Romania, claims he had more than 100 calls in the past week from women inviting him round for sex, the local daily Libertatea reported.

The mayor said: "The number was meant for complaints but some women took it as a sex hotline.

"I can understand these ladies have desires but their kind of problems need to be solved somewhere else, not at the town hall."

agencies

`
0 Replies
 
msolga
 
  1  
Reply Wed 24 Nov, 2004 05:32 am
Tuesday November 23, 2004

To avoid detection after robbing a jewellery shop, a Taiwanese man hid in an attic with a stock of bread and water. This week, a month after the robbery, he turned himself in to police, saying he could no longer stand his own body odour.
0 Replies
 
cavfancier
 
  1  
Reply Wed 24 Nov, 2004 05:44 am
The final word on the infamous cheese sandwich:

Cheese Sandwich Bought for $28,000
Nov 23, 10:41 AM (ET)

MIAMI (Reuters) - An online casino won the eBay bidding for a decade-old cheese sandwich bearing what some people consider a likeness of the Virgin Mary and immediately began hawking Virgin Mary Grilled Cheese T-shirts.

GoldenPalace.com's bid of $28,000 was the highest offer for the sandwich when bidding closed late on Monday, the Internet casino's Web site said.

The seller, Fort Lauderdale, Florida resident Diana Duyser, says she made the cheese sandwich 10 years ago and after taking a bite, saw "the Virgin Mary staring back at me."

In her eBay ad, Duyser said the sandwich has been kept in a plastic case for a decade and has developed no mold or bacteria. "It is like a miracle," she said.

"I would like all people to know that I do believe that this is the Virgin Mary Mother Of God," the ad said. "That is my solemn belief, but you are free to believe that she is whomever you like, I am not scamming anyone."

GoldenPalace.com said on its Web site that the "sacred sandwich" had received more than 1.7 million hits since being posted on eBay. The company's chief executive, Richard Rowe, said the sandwich would be used to raise money for charity.

The T-shirts, in various styles bearing a picture of the sandwich and a GoldenPalace.com logo, sell for $19.99.

"We believe that everyone should be able to see it and learn of its mystical power for themselves," Rowe said.
0 Replies
 
msolga
 
  1  
Reply Wed 24 Nov, 2004 05:49 am
A real little earner, that sandwich! Laughing
0 Replies
 
cavfancier
 
  1  
Reply Wed 24 Nov, 2004 05:50 am
I keep thinking that if the sandwich was made from say, Wonder Bread and Velveeta, that would explain it's mouldless longevity.
0 Replies
 
msolga
 
  1  
Reply Wed 24 Nov, 2004 06:00 am
Laughing

But what sort of cheese lasts that long, cav? Confused
0 Replies
 
cavfancier
 
  1  
Reply Wed 24 Nov, 2004 06:01 am
Cheese that is labelled "cheese food product", not "cheese", like Velveeta.
0 Replies
 
msolga
 
  1  
Reply Wed 24 Nov, 2004 06:04 am
Truly amazing lasting powers! But is it edible?
0 Replies
 
cavfancier
 
  1  
Reply Wed 24 Nov, 2004 06:10 am
msolga, please look at this link and ask yourself if any of it looks edible:

http://www.foodsubs.com/Cheprocessed.html#pasteurized%20process%20cheese%20food
0 Replies
 
cavfancier
 
  1  
Reply Wed 24 Nov, 2004 06:11 am
<edit> double post
0 Replies
 
msolga
 
  1  
Reply Wed 24 Nov, 2004 06:19 am
I see! But it seems to have it's artistic purposes. And might be a good play dough substitute? :wink:
0 Replies
 
cavfancier
 
  1  
Reply Wed 24 Nov, 2004 07:50 am
msolga, it makes pretty good spackle as well.
0 Replies
 
msolga
 
  1  
Reply Wed 24 Nov, 2004 08:27 am
Laughing
0 Replies
 
 

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