I want to divorce my mother

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For about a year now I've been trying to research how to terminate my mother's parental rights. My parents have been divorced since I was 2 1/2 and I've lived primarily with my father. I'm currently a college student and my mother offers absolutely no assistance to me. She was always delinquent on her child support when I was growing up and she continues to pay for nothing. This is a little frustrating as she is re-married to a successful pediatrician. I have a fabulous step mother who supports me completely willing to adopt me. Do I have a case against my mother?

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How old are you? In college -- so I believe you are at least 18 yrs of age...right? Your Mother will always be your mother... can't change it. We can pick our friends, not our family.... but it sounds like you are old enough to choose where and with whom you spend your time. I believe there's a word call "emancipated" -- which I'm not sure exactly how it works legally... maybe it's similar to the divorce you're looking for. We all seem to think the grass is greener on the other side. There's a terrific set of books out there.. the first one is titled "A Child called It"... it reminds some of us to count our blessings. Good luck with your life. Move on and try not to live in the past.

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I am confused. You are a college student? Why would you want to be adopted now, when you're almost a legal adult?

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You are a college student. What possible advantage would you have by "divorcing" your mother?

txtechDG wrote:

I'm currently a college student and my mother offers absolutely no assistance to me. She was always delinquent on her child support when I was growing up and she continues to pay for nothing. This is a little frustrating as she is re-married to a successful pediatrician. I have a fabulous step mother who supports me completely willing to adopt me.

From what you write, I am getting the feeling that money has a lot to do with your desire to cut off ties with your mother. Did you have any sort of emotional relationship with her? Would you please elaborate?

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tx--

Are you looking for some sort of public legal procedure or a outward emotional ceremony? To an outsider, it seems that you have accomplished "divorce" in your own mind.

What "rights" do you feel your mother still holds over you?

Aren't you 18--a legal adult? If she is not contributing to your expenses and you are not forced to spend time with her, why is a "divorce" necessary?

You and your stepmother have formed a relationship by choice. Good. Still, at 18 you are no longer a child and parental relationships should be becoming less important to you.

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Perhaps the effort to divorce Mom is financially motivated? E. g. do aid packages take Mom's finances into account? If so, the remedy is to talk to your Financial Aid office.

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Smart thinking, jespah, I bet that explains a lot, and it would be a quandary.

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Thanks but No Thanks
For all of you doubting my motives in wanting a LEGAL separation from my mother, I hope to help you out. When I was 2 1/2 years old she snuck out of our house in the middle of the night unbeknownst to anyone to be with her boyfriend whom she'd been having an affair with for the entire time she was married to my dad (about 9 years). We didn't hear from her for over 2 years after that. My interactions with her since then have been very limited excluding a 6 month period when I was 11 where she sued my dad for custody claiming he had a drug problem that made him an unfit father. After multiple negative drug tests the courts ruled that she was in fact lying and returned me to my dad. My reasons for wanting her legally out of my life should be a little more clear by now. My main reason for wanting this is because now that i'm in college information from both of my parents is required to process just about everything, including, yes, financial aid. I would much prefer that my mother was not included in any aspect of my life. I would like all of the consideration to be for my step mother who has raised me since I was 6 and whom I consider to be my mom. I posted this on a legal board in hopes of some sound legal advice. Thank you for all of your other prospectives but if someone could help me out in a legal sense I would really appreciate it.

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Why didn't you tell us that in the beginning? Now what you are saying certainly makes sense!

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If you're already 18 she has no parental rights...if you hate her that badly just tell her to piss off...if you're trying to blackmail her emotionally for money....move on

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Bi- If she is going to college, and wants financial aid, she has to include her mother's income. Her mother does not support her, but the mother's income might make her ineligible for the aid that she needs.

I am wondering if her circumstances were known, if she could get some sort of a waiver in terms of not reporting her mother's income?

txtechDG- You really need to check that out. Talk to the financial aid officer in your school.

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I like jespah's and bipolar's advice.

Talk to the financial aid department at your college/university. And move on with your own life.

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Re: Thanks but No Thanks

txtechDG wrote:

For all of you doubting my motives in wanting a LEGAL separation from my mother, I hope to help you out. When I was 2 1/2 years old she snuck out of our house in the middle of the night unbeknownst to anyone to be with her boyfriend whom she'd been having an affair with for the entire time she was married to my dad (about 9 years). We didn't hear from her for over 2 years after that. My interactions with her since then have been very limited excluding a 6 month period when I was 11 where she sued my dad for custody claiming he had a drug problem that made him an unfit father. After multiple negative drug tests the courts ruled that she was in fact lying and returned me to my dad. My reasons for wanting her legally out of my life should be a little more clear by now. My main reason for wanting this is because now that i'm in college information from both of my parents is required to process just about everything, including, yes, financial aid. I would much prefer that my mother was not included in any aspect of my life. I would like all of the consideration to be for my step mother who has raised me since I was 6 and whom I consider to be my mom. I posted this on a legal board in hopes of some sound legal advice. Thank you for all of your other prospectives but if someone could help me out in a legal sense I would really appreciate it.

I take it you currently live in Texas. Does your step mother also live in Texas? Look here for the "adult adoption" statutes for Texas (Subchapter F):

Quote:

SUBCHAPTER F. ADOPTION OF AN ADULT

§ 162.501. ADOPTION OF ADULT. The court may grant the petition of an adult residing in this state to adopt another adult according to this subchapter.

Added by Acts 1995, 74th Leg., ch. 20, § 1, eff. April 20, 1995.

§ 162.502. JURISDICTION. The petitioner shall file a
suit to adopt an adult in the district court or a statutory county court granted jurisdiction in family law cases and proceedings by Chapter 25, Government Code, in the county of the petitioner's residence.

Added by Acts 1995, 74th Leg., ch. 20, § 1, eff. April 20, 1995.

§ 162.503. REQUIREMENTS OF PETITION. (a) A petition to adopt an adult shall be entitled "In the Interest of __________, An Adult."
(b) If the petitioner is married, both spouses must join in the petition for adoption.

Added by Acts 1995, 74th Leg., ch. 20, § 1, eff. April 20, 1995.

§ 162.504. CONSENT. A court may not grant an adoption unless the adult consents in writing to be adopted by the petitioner.

Added by Acts 1995, 74th Leg., ch. 20, § 1, eff. April 20, 1995.

§ 162.505. ATTENDANCE REQUIRED. The petitioner and the adult to be adopted must attend the hearing. For good cause shown, the court may waive this requirement, by written order, if the petitioner or adult to be adopted is unable to attend.

Added by Acts 1995, 74th Leg., ch. 20, § 1, eff. April 20, 1995.

§ 162.506. ADOPTION ORDER. (a) The court shall grant the adoption if the court finds that the requirements for adoption
of an adult are met.
(b) Notwithstanding that both spouses have joined in a petition for the adoption of an adult as required by Section 162.503(b), the court may grant the adoption of the adult to both spouses or, on request of the spouses, to only one spouse.

Added by Acts 1995, 74th Leg., ch. 20, § 1, eff. April 20, 1995.
Amended by Acts 2003, 78th Leg., ch. 555, § 1, eff. June 20,
2003.

§ 162.507. EFFECT OF ADOPTION. (a) The adopted adult is the son or daughter of the adoptive parents for all purposes.
(b) The adopted adult is entitled to inherit from and
through the adopted adult's adoptive parents as though the adopted adult were the biological child of the adoptive parents.
(c) The adopted adult retains the right to inherit from the adult's biological parents. However, a biological parent may not inherit from or through an adopted adult.

Added by Acts 1995, 74th Leg., ch. 20, § 1, eff. April 20, 1995.

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Actually parental rights dont really stop at 18, she's still required as a cosigner on every federal loan and her financial information is considered. She can also still claim me as a dependent on her taxes as long as I'm a student, even if she isn't supporting me. While she claims me as a dependent I can't file for federal aid on my own.

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Contact your local bar association--or legal aid--and ask a lawyer for advice. This is a complicated situation.

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Phoenix32890 wrote:

If she is going to college, and wants financial aid, she has to include her mother's income. Her mother does not support her, but the mother's income might make her ineligible for the aid that she needs.

Having pointed that out Phoenix...
I personally have a missing parent in my life.
It was VERY hard for me to apply for aide when I was in college... until I realized that all I had to do was write in ' unknown ' on parents info.
This may not apply to you Tx.. but I didnt think it would work until I did it.
Ask your student aide officers if there is something you can do because you DONT know where your mom is.. or what she is doing and you DONT have contact with her.
Yes, in your situation this may be stretching the truth a bit.. BUT if you go the legal route to ridding your mom of her parental rights, you do run the risk of people saying.. " If you can afford a lawyer for THAT you can afford school" . Be careful where you put your money right now. Remember big dollar purchases ( lawyers included ) create a paper trail that your school may be able to use against you. Try just denying her yourself. Work on it legally later. Get the aide you need now. She doesnt live with you, she doesnt provide for you ... so in the eyes of the LAW she isnt there... you can say just that.
Good luck to you. Im sorry you ended up with such a shitty parent. People dont deserve that.

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I want to divorce my mother

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