your hair has been through it. honestly I did something similar to my hair to get the ombre look a few years ago. I ended up bleaching my entire head at home and fixed it at a salon, then a month later got a perm that messed up my hair so bad, it was like a birds nest.
The only advice for it to be normal again, is time and let to it grow. cut the ends little by little. In the meantime, however, keep doing what you are doing now.
Never wash your hair with hot water, always cool/cold, because warm water dries up your hair and can make your hair fall out from the roots.
Do at home deep conditioning treatments. also use little shampoo or stick to just rinsing your scalp thoroughly.
after washing do a treatment like:
-use a good/natural deep leave in conditioner mix it with
-olive oil and coconut oil
-a little bit of apple vinegar
(and anything that will soften and moisturize the hair)
add to your tips work your way up and leave it for half hour.
(if you really want you can wrap in foil and blow dry a little to open the cuticle of your hair then rinse with cold water)
rinse it well with cool water, don't wash it, just rinse it afterwards
this should really help with the nest issue. best of luck!! be patient !