All that matters is how we feel

My feelings of happiness, love, joy, beauty, inspiration, drive, etc. which are all my good feelings, these are the only experiences that make my entire life and my composing hobby worth living for and they are the only experiences that give value and joy to my life and composing. There is no other form of happiness, love, joy, beauty, inspiration, value, worth, and drive in my life.

My chemical induced good feelings are the only source of those things since they are the actual chemical messages of happiness, love, joy, beauty, inspiration, value, worth, and drive to my brain. It is no different than physical pain. Without experiencing physical pain, then it is quite obvious that you are not in physical pain. Your feelings of pain are the only experiences that can give you pain just as how it is only your feelings of love, joy, beauty, inspiration, value, worth, and drive that can give you those things in your life. Therefore, the only thing that matters in life is how we feel.

Our feelings are the only things that can determine the value of our lives. Or, at least, my life. Good feelings yield good value to our lives, no feelings yield no value, and the worst feelings such as depression and misery yield the worst value to our lives. I just don't agree with what some other people would say which is that there are other sources of pain, misery, joy, love, value, worth, etc. besides our feelings of those things. This is because, from my own personal experience, all other versions are mechanical and not the real thing. It's like thinking you can see when you are blind or thinking you can hear when you are deaf. That would not be any real sight or hearing; just a matter of deluding yourself.

Therefore, it is imperative that I have these good feelings at all times in my life. There are a number of factors and situations that can take these feelings away from me since these feelings are very fleeting for virtually everyone. Such situations could be those that cause brain damage to those feel-good areas of the brain such as lack of circulation, heart attack, stroke, autoimmune diseases, etc. Another type of situation would be those situations I've struggled with much of my life which would be traumatic experiences due to ocd induced worries. These good feelings are the most profoundly beautiful experiences in my life and it is, therefore, vital that such situations are avoided at all costs in my life.

When I don't have these good feelings, then I give up on everything in my life because I absolutely cannot stand living my life and doing my composing hobby like a lifeless machine/statue set in motion. My life and my composing needs to be worth living for and my good feelings are an absolute necessary condition to make that happen. I plan on fully dedicating my time and my life to composing like how any hardcore 10,000 hour rule musician would and I plan on becoming a great composer since that is my dream. But my good feelings are the only things that can make that happen.