Quote:You know - Reem - all these situations ofcourse , and you know how does the one look like then.
no idea what you are saying
Quote:No one met me at the house when I arrived there shortly, and I was glad for this.
shortly is an adjective but it cannot be used on an "arrived"...you need to say "shortly after".
it is more customary to say in this order:
I was glad when no one met me at the house
Quote:So, I walked to my room and sat on the bed , preocupied.
we don't talk using the same kind of sentences as when we write. this must be confusing for you because in forums we write the way we talk...so tkae out the "so,". you can choose to put preocupied at the beginning with a comma or leave it at the end like you have it.
Quote:It seemed like that all of them wanted me out this house , the old lady and ( Sandra ) , and it looked like I was going to do this .
1. remove "that all"
2. wanted me out
of this house
3. you are phrasing this as if you were going to be listing of 3 or more names...in which case, you would use a colon instead of a period before listing them. however, you only have 2 names...so you should rephrase it.
4. do not put parenthesis around Sara
5. "this" is supposed to refer to "leave the house". but in your sentence, it technically refers to "house" and so the sentence makes no sense technically. as a reader, we know what you mean to say....but you should not rely on the reader's logic being used to decipher your meaning.
one alternative:
The old lady and Sara wanted me out of the house...and it looked like they would get their wish.
and what? you cant do this
Quote:Again, the peasant lying inside me woke up to ask me about magnanimity and chivalry; the old lady had no companion among human.She was old and in danger. So, what your attitude would be then?.
1. with this kind of metaphore it is customary to not specify the way that the peasant is inside of you, so remove lying
2. peasant doesn't really fit here for your meaning
3. good use of semicolon, but "human" should be plural
4. remove "Again,"
Quote:So, what your attitude would be then?.
no place for this sentence..
Quote:At the end, an intermediary solution; I would stay two days or more until things clear up.Then , I could leave conscienciously.
1. okay...this time you did not use the semicolon so well.
In the end, [n]I came to[/n] an intermediary solution[n]:[/n] I would stay a few more days or until things clear
ed [past tense because you will be looking back] up. Then I could leave
in good conscience.
Saying conscienciously isn't wrong, but this is the regular way.
Quote:Being sure of my decision - Reem- , I left the room. I was up to tell the major and ( Sandra ) about what had happened to the old lady.
No dashes, no parenthesis...as a result, I don't know what you're saying
Quote:I walked down the stair to the lounge , made a hem , and walked in. I was expecting to find no body there , or just at least ( Sandra ).But , the opposite was true.
1. you did some quick repairs to your dress before entering? that is what making a hem means
2. nobody is one word
3. just and at least should not both be simultaneously used because they are repetetive
4. nooo parenthesis
5. don't end the sentence, use a comma, say "blagh blagh, but the opposite was true."
Quote:I was shocked to see them all; ( Sandra ) , the major , ( Jason ) , the lovely couple , and the excited sedate man.
take out the parenthesis and you're golden..
Quote:Six of the unwanted guests were sitting at the old lady's lounge , who threw them out before.
1. who
had thrown them out before
this sentence IS CORRECT.....but that's just because you're VERY LUCKY! I don't think you understand the reason why, though...
a pronoun always refers back to the last valid noun...
so "who" would refer to "old lady", and "them" would refer back to "guests" because it is plural even though it is before lady...
so this is correct, but most poeple will think it is wrong because it is not normally phrased this way
try:
Six of the guests who had been thrown out by the old lady before were sitting in the lounge.
I guess !
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