Fairytale

Very nice

thanks its a new style... dont know if i'll stay with or not

i vote to never stay with any style

Very very nice lyric, Seed. The flow accentuates your core message. Outstanding.

Vote to not vote

Hey seed, You already know what I think...hehe... talk to ya later!

lol thanks stand up..

Hi Seed. Here I am.

I like the premise of your love as a fairy tale and think it has some very good images but I am confused without any punctuation, especially when there are what seems like the near interjections of "kiss me" and "we can."

For example, this line is obviously deep, but is there a word missing or am I just missing something?

"With those lips I feel kiss me"

Do you mean "WHEN those lips...."?

<hanging head>

Everyone else seems to have it figured out and enjoys it, so ignore my critique as the meaningless drivel of an old woman who no longer understands modern poetry. I'm sure your girl thought it was wonderful... and in the end, that's the most important thing. Was it Shakespeare??? or Donne or someone who said that poems are written so that you can get laid -- the true meaning of a successful poem.

nope not missing anything... i dont really write to get laid... though its an interesting idea... i just write to get things off my chest about how i feel.... thanks everyone for reading..

Looks like Seed may have stumbled upon an excellent perk for excellent poetry :-)

humm...its worked for me

awesome glad you like it stuh

Heehee... I think Stuh was talking about the perks of poetry.

lol ah i see what you mean now...

What better advertisement can there be for this forum? Do we have any volunteers for role of Poster Child?

nothing says poster child like the facial hair im sportin

You, Seed, are a poetic sponge of love.

eh i does what i does with what i does it with

Very nice Seed, you have a way with words

thank you very much color book