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Have you ever...... (for Kellyvinal and Himszy)

 
 
Reply Mon 4 Oct, 2004 01:05 pm
This ones especially for Kellyvinal coz she's a star and her comments on my work have given me the confidence to show some of my mates some of what I have posted on this site. Thankyou!!!!



Have you ever just walked
Not tried to think
Know not where you're going
Felt conciusness sink
Away from the light
And into the dark
Then burn right out
Like a white hot spark.
Have you ever just seen
From all points of view
Not thought of the difference
I might see from you
And just not concidered
what others may feel
About, what to you,
Is almost unreal
Have you ever just slept
Shut out everything
Heard only the song
That your heart strings sing
Just let yourself go
Fall into the deep
A whisper of death
Thats sends you to sleep
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Type: Discussion • Score: 1 • Views: 555 • Replies: 2
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kellyvinal
 
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Reply Mon 4 Oct, 2004 01:20 pm
Blacklacebutterfly, you have successfully stitched a pounding meter into an evocative and emotive poem. That is no small feat for a piece of this breadth. I'm in awe :-) Keep it flowing!
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Zedd
 
  1  
Reply Mon 4 Oct, 2004 10:14 pm
Blacklacebutterfly,
ur poem is soooo beautiful! I love it!
keep up the good work.
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