1
   

Hamlet Swats a Fly

 
 
Reply Tue 28 Sep, 2004 06:34 am
I have come to the temple of insects
where the buzz and hum of the hive
echos off the tiny cubicle walls,
perfectly designed
for clipping wings.

Buzzing and humming,
the sound of thought within the cells.
Only the occupants know what happens
when they sleep.

Some buzz and hum,
Others choose ?'perchance to dream.'
  • Topic Stats
  • Top Replies
  • Link to this Topic
Type: Discussion • Score: 1 • Views: 785 • Replies: 8
No top replies

 
George
 
  1  
Reply Tue 28 Sep, 2004 06:50 am
Behind and under
Not quite out of sight
Slithery serpentine tangle of cable

Provides the power
To twiddle the bits
0 Replies
 
kellyvinal
 
  1  
Reply Tue 28 Sep, 2004 08:53 am
to sleep... to sleep...

Very nice change of pace, cav!
0 Replies
 
cavfancier
 
  1  
Reply Tue 28 Sep, 2004 09:02 am
Oooh...'change of pace' intrigues me as commentary kelly. Can you elaborate? I am preparing a few short pieces for submission.
0 Replies
 
kellyvinal
 
  1  
Reply Wed 29 Sep, 2004 01:22 am
Well, I'm not sure how far beyond my original observation I can elaborate! The change of pace to which I refer is the contextual shift in time and the abstract nature of the piece, en toto. The first thought that comes to mind is Dickenson's 'I Heard a Fly Buzz When I Died', though the two poems are diametric in their meaning. Yours evokes Shakespearian themes, and those are always welcome to an informed constituency :-)
0 Replies
 
cavfancier
 
  1  
Reply Wed 29 Sep, 2004 03:03 am
Just a total diversion, every time I hear 'en toto' I can't help thinking 'I'll get you and your little dog too!' Then I remember the scamp's daring escape from the wicked witch. "On Toto!" I yell, inside. Laughing I am too much the free-associator.
0 Replies
 
edgarblythe
 
  1  
Reply Wed 29 Sep, 2004 04:43 am
I like it, too, Cav.
0 Replies
 
cavfancier
 
  1  
Reply Wed 29 Sep, 2004 04:52 am
Thanks edgar and kelly. As I revise other pieces, I'll post them. Your advice is always appreciated. I am looking to get at least 10-20 works edited, to submit 5-8 to the magazines.
0 Replies
 
kellyvinal
 
  1  
Reply Wed 29 Sep, 2004 06:32 am
Good luck - you got the gift!
0 Replies
 
 

Related Topics

What inspired you to write...discuss - Discussion by lostnsearching
It floated there..... - Discussion by Letty
Small Voices - Discussion by Endymion
Rockets Red Glare - Discussion by edgarblythe
Short Story: Wilkerson's Tank - Discussion by edgarblythe
The Virtual Storytellers Campfire - Discussion by cavfancier
1st Annual Able2Know Halloween Story Contest - Discussion by realjohnboy
Literary Agents (a resource for writers) - Discussion by Craven de Kere
 
  1. Forums
  2. » Hamlet Swats a Fly
Copyright © 2026 MadLab, LLC :: Terms of Service :: Privacy Policy :: Page generated in 0.03 seconds on 03/10/2026 at 06:38:19