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Arguing Without the Quote Button

 
 
Reply Sun 19 Sep, 2004 09:27 pm
As if life wasn't hard enough on me, I find out today that quote buttons don't work in real-life situations.

Try arguing with somebody, then make it harder because that person is an irrational female, and top it off with the fact that the person you are arguing with is your mother. Painfully frustrating situation? Grrr.....

I started a simple debate about whether or not reading books was more intellectual than watching a TV show and she decides on her point of view, digs a trench, and bunkers down so that no matter how much truth and good sense I throw at her she won't budge.

The worst part about it is that she doesn't play by the rules of good conduct. She frequently makes flawed statements and ad hominem arguments but when I try to quote what she said earlier she tells me that she said something different.

If I could only bug the room so that everything she says is on tape, I could easily prove that she said what I heard.

How in the world can I quote someone during a discussion when they won't agree that they said what they said earlier?
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Type: Discussion • Score: 1 • Views: 2,438 • Replies: 38
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cavfancier
 
  1  
Reply Sun 19 Sep, 2004 09:38 pm
You can't sadly. I can't tell you the number of times I've tried.
0 Replies
 
roger
 
  1  
Reply Sun 19 Sep, 2004 09:39 pm
Re: Arguing Without the Quote Button
Individual wrote:
As if life wasn't hard enough on me, I find out today my mother has finally discovered that I am ascribing false quotes to her


It's a frustration, isn't it. Be aware, though, on a2k, quotes can be altered.

Very Happy
0 Replies
 
cavfancier
 
  1  
Reply Sun 19 Sep, 2004 09:40 pm
I've been guilty of being on the other side as well, but when I absolutely know I can't remember what it was I said, I make no argument about it, and generally laugh at my own silliness.
0 Replies
 
Individual
 
  1  
Reply Sun 19 Sep, 2004 09:40 pm
Roger, you can still look back to the original post. And if it has been edited, you will at least know that it has.
0 Replies
 
Asherman
 
  1  
Reply Sun 19 Sep, 2004 10:43 pm
Listen son, you have learned a valuable lesson. You can not win an arguement with a woman. To even attempt winning an arguement with your Mother is hazardous to your physical and mental health.

In the good old days we kept them in the kitchen or church minding the children, and out of politics. Can you see where we slipped up? Laughing
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rufio
 
  1  
Reply Sun 19 Sep, 2004 11:50 pm
I think for some people, even taping them won't be enough. Razz Parents especially.
0 Replies
 
cavfancier
 
  1  
Reply Mon 20 Sep, 2004 12:08 am
rufio wrote:
I think for some people, even taping them won't be enough. Razz Parents especially.


Unless of course you tape their mouths shut, and bind their hands. Laughing Incidentally, I am in no way condoning this. :wink:
0 Replies
 
dlowan
 
  1  
Reply Mon 20 Sep, 2004 03:01 am
Re: Arguing Without the Quote Button
Individual wrote:
As if life wasn't hard enough on me, I find out today that quote buttons don't work in real-life situations.

Try arguing with somebody, then make it harder because that person is an irrational female, and top it off with the fact that the person you are arguing with is your mother. Painfully frustrating situation? Grrr.....

I started a simple debate about whether or not reading books was more intellectual than watching a TV show and she decides on her point of view, digs a trench, and bunkers down so that no matter how much truth and good sense I throw at her she won't budge.

The worst part about it is that she doesn't play by the rules of good conduct. She frequently makes flawed statements and ad hominem arguments but when I try to quote what she said earlier she tells me that she said something different.

If I could only bug the room so that everything she says is on tape, I could easily prove that she said what I heard.

How in the world can I quote someone during a discussion when they won't agree that they said what they said earlier?


This is life - and, I might add, memory is infinitely mutable, and subject to both your, and your mother's, desires aboout what you/the other REALLY said.

Which side were you on? Lemme guess. The side of TV?????



Oh - and Asherman is so gonna suffer.
0 Replies
 
dlowan
 
  1  
Reply Mon 20 Sep, 2004 03:06 am
I will add that, for true humiliation, try arguing with someone for hours on IM - only to read back and find that they really DID concede your point in the first couple of exchanges. Also you then see all the nuances - not to mention actual posts - you missed in their argument - and how often, and how much, they missed the point of what you were saying - and how much, much, much, better you could have argued your case!
0 Replies
 
Phoenix32890
 
  1  
Reply Mon 20 Sep, 2004 03:43 am
Attempting to argue with your mother, when she "knows" that she is right, is like attempting to roll a boulder uphill. It can be done, but not without superhuman effort.

Remember that your mother not only knows which of your buttons to push, but has actually created and installed those buttons. She will use them to make her points.

If you know that you cannot debate with her, why bother? She has the psychological advantage from the getgo. Why is is SO important to you to prove to you mother that you are right?
0 Replies
 
dlowan
 
  1  
Reply Mon 20 Sep, 2004 04:01 am
Er - might he BE right???


Lol!
0 Replies
 
joefromchicago
 
  1  
Reply Mon 20 Sep, 2004 08:10 am
Re: Arguing Without the Quote Button
roger wrote:
Be aware, though, on a2k, quotes cannot be altered.

Very Happy

Really?
0 Replies
 
extra medium
 
  1  
Reply Mon 20 Sep, 2004 03:06 pm
My grandpa gave me this piece of advice when arguing with a woman:
"When you feel like debating with her, keep asking yourself: 'Do I want to be right, or do I want to be in her good graces?'"

You can very much win the argument logically. (the battle)
And very much lose her feelings for you. (the war)

But to win the argument and stay in good graces appear to be nearly impossible?

Ask yourself: How do you feel about someone (male or female) after they have completely dismantled your logic, utterly destroyed and humiliated you in an argument. They won, by any fair account. Still: Do you feel like immediately giving them a lot of love on any level?

When you feel like arguing, keep asking yourself: "Where do I really want to be? Where do I really want to be?" "Do I want to be right, or have a loving day/evening?"

I've found this works wonders. Most arguments with close loved ones aren't worth engaging in.

Thats why I vent and dump all my petty grievances and arguments on this board! Twisted Evil

And I love all of you for allowing me to do that.
0 Replies
 
dlowan
 
  1  
Reply Mon 20 Sep, 2004 03:29 pm
Mind you, when you absolutely blow a fella out of the water with your logic and reason, you feel kinda warm....
0 Replies
 
extra medium
 
  1  
Reply Mon 20 Sep, 2004 03:33 pm
dlowan wrote:
Mind you, when you absolutely blow a fella out of the water with your logic and reason, you feel kinda warm....


hmmm....good to know, good to know.

Does that mean a guy should put up a flimsy argument, let the woman win, then be ready to head upstairs? Laughing

just asking...
0 Replies
 
ehBeth
 
  1  
Reply Mon 20 Sep, 2004 03:36 pm
I have started to dislike the quote button here. People insist on quoting reams and reams of, to be polite, stuff. No real life conversation has imbedded quotes in it.

and then you said and then i said and then i referenced and then he said and then i said and then you said and then i said and then he said and now i'm saying this


harrumph
0 Replies
 
panzade
 
  1  
Reply Mon 20 Sep, 2004 03:36 pm
I admire Ashermans bravery and foolishness.
0 Replies
 
dlowan
 
  1  
Reply Mon 20 Sep, 2004 03:49 pm
extra medium wrote:
dlowan wrote:
Mind you, when you absolutely blow a fella out of the water with your logic and reason, you feel kinda warm....


hmmm....good to know, good to know.

Does that mean a guy should put up a flimsy argument, let the woman win, then be ready to head upstairs? Laughing

just asking...


No.
0 Replies
 
extra medium
 
  1  
Reply Mon 20 Sep, 2004 04:06 pm
Oh.
0 Replies
 
 

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