Brits only go to Switzerland for the cheese and the clocks . . .

Reply Sun 30 Aug, 2015 04:31 am
Because, otherwise, they're too expensive as imports.
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Reply Sun 30 Aug, 2015 04:35 am
Oh yeah . . . and because they're anal retentive about keeping the hotels clean.
Reply Sun 30 Aug, 2015 07:52 am
Oops - I just said similar on that thread but hadn't seen this thread yet. Ha!
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Reply Mon 31 Aug, 2015 03:38 am
You're relying too much on Orson Welles.

Harry Lime: Don't be so gloomy. After all it's not that awful. Like the fella says, in Italy for 30 years under the Borgias they had warfare, terror, murder, and bloodshed, but they produced Michelangelo, Leonardo da Vinci, and the Renaissance. In Switzerland they had brotherly love - they had 500 years of democracy and peace, and what did that produce? The cuckoo clock. So long Holly.

The cuckoo clock was invented in Germany, my cuckoo clock is from Germany, and as for cheese, we invented cheddar and France is just over the channel.

Rich Britons go to Switzerland to open bank accounts.
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Tes yeux noirs
Reply Mon 31 Aug, 2015 03:51 am
You can produce daft stereotypes about just any country or culture in the world. They tend to be thought "funny" by stupid people, in my opinion, except the more offensive ones about Americans, which are spot-on.
Reply Mon 31 Aug, 2015 04:00 am
@Tes yeux noirs,
In Setanta's defence this thread is a parody of one some idiot started about Dignitas.
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Tes yeux noirs
Reply Mon 31 Aug, 2015 04:10 am
Yes, I saw that, slagging off the Dutch wasn't he? I wonder if he had been listening to John Dowie's 1977 satirical song "I'm a British Tourist", often called the "I hate the Dutch" song.

I'm a British Tourist and I'm very, very rude.
I hate the stinking foreigners
hate their stinking food
I don't like French or Germans
I don't care for Belgians much
But worst of all worst of all
I hate the Dutch

The Dutch, the Dutch
I hate them worse than dogs.
They live in windmills
and mince around in clogs.
They don't have any manners
They don't say 'thanks' or 'please'
all they eat is tulips
and stinking Gouda cheese...

I'm a British tourist with a countenance severe
I love to strike the foreign type
And box their poxied ears
But there's one woggy dago
I cannot bear to touch
The slimy crawling
stench appalling
snotty grotty Dutch

The Dutch are mad
Their fingers stuck in dikes
They use the wrong side of the road
And ride around on bikes
They don't have any manners,
don't have any brains.
There's only one race worse than them
and that's... THE DANES!
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Tes yeux noirs
Reply Mon 31 Aug, 2015 05:13 am
I was once in a French train and I got chatting to an older French lady (in French) and after a bit she asked if I was from la Suisse romande. I was very flattered!
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Reply Tue 1 Sep, 2015 02:44 am
I don't care where cuckoo clocks come from, i'd throw a shoe at the damned thing before 24 hours had passed . . . i don't care for swiss cheese.
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