Reply Sun 31 May, 2015 08:39 pm
This is going to sound utterly crazy and to be honest I don't even know if it is real but at this point I have to ask. How does one lift a Shakespearean curse? Me and my class went to the Ashland Shakespeare Festival and literally all of us came back with a curse. Our lives have all become tragic . Like this sounds ridiculous trust me i'm thinking the same thing while writing this but literally there are some many tragedies on all of our lives the second we get back it is not a coincidence. Just when life was looking up me and my friends we walk out of a grocery store and we get **** on by a bird and it's just tragedy everyday. So does anyone know how to lift a curse lol? We think we pissed off Shakespeare or something along those lines.
 
chai2
 
  2  
Reply Sun 31 May, 2015 09:02 pm
@Jewels345,
You must soak a mandrake root in sheeps milk overnight in a bowl under your bed.
Then, hollow out a pinapple, insert the mandrake root and place it at the entrance of the nearest building with a colanade. The curse will be transferred to the 2nd cousin of whoever picks up the pineapple.

Oh. This must be done on the ides of the month, before vespers.
edgarblythe
 
  2  
Reply Sun 31 May, 2015 09:03 pm
@Jewels345,
If you believe in superstition, all you have to do is believe and anticipate and you will seemingly draw down curses on yourself. You will begin to interpret the trivial as significant. You have to shake it off and be positive and soon you will forget all about it.
0 Replies
 
Jewels345
 
  1  
Reply Sun 31 May, 2015 10:59 pm
@chai2,
this made me laugh so hard, I guess it brighten my day a little
0 Replies
 
jespah
 
  3  
Reply Mon 1 Jun, 2015 06:21 am
@Jewels345,
That's not tragedy, that's misfortune.

And it's random chance. I was riding in a car, carpooling with a guy from work, and the sunroof was open (his car). A bird, with considerably better aim than yours, shat on his shoulder. While he was wearing a suit, and we were riding on the Long Island Expressway.

He was not cursed. He was just shat on. It happens. Birds ****. Sometimes people are under them.

Tragedy is finding out a parent has cancer, or someone has been in a serious auto accident. It is losing your home, or losing a partner or sibling or friend to addiction. It's the love of your life leaving for the last time.

It isn't shitting birds.

Causation does not imply causality. Get a grip.
FBM
 
  2  
Reply Mon 1 Jun, 2015 06:50 am
@Jewels345,
Like you lift anything else, if you're smart: back straight, bend at the knees.
0 Replies
 
Lordyaswas
 
  5  
Reply Mon 1 Jun, 2015 06:59 am
Having a bird **** on you is considered good luck in the UK. Some Tory MP's have been known to pay good money for that particular service.

On lottery days I sometimes go and sit on a bench in Kensington Gardens and cover myself with breadcrumbs.
chai2
 
  2  
Reply Mon 1 Jun, 2015 12:29 pm
@Lordyaswas,
As a teenager, I was three quarters of the way toward getting out of a car, left arm extended on the open door, right arm extended back, face turned toward the sun.

A seagull the size of a beagle flew overhead at the exact velocity to straff me with half an inch of seagull **** (which is the worst kind of bird ****) from one end to the other.
RABEL222
 
  2  
Reply Mon 1 Jun, 2015 05:47 pm
@chai2,
Is this a good memory or a bad memory?
0 Replies
 
Jewels345
 
  -1  
Reply Mon 1 Jun, 2015 06:11 pm
@jespah,
you my friend dont understand how to take jokes so chill
Lordyaswas
 
  4  
Reply Mon 1 Jun, 2015 08:12 pm
@Jewels345,
Don't go embarrassing yourself here, jewels old boy.

Our Jespah has more humour than you can fit into both of your brain cells, and is probably one of the funniest posters here when humour is called for.

Lordyaswas
 
  1  
Reply Mon 1 Jun, 2015 08:16 pm
@chai2,
I once had a squadron of turkeys strafe my old Mini Cooper, just in time for the summer sun to bake it rock hard all day whilst I was at work.

It looked like one of those joke advertising vehicles. A giant heap of guano with wheels.
FBM
 
  2  
Reply Mon 1 Jun, 2015 08:22 pm
@Lordyaswas,
Lordyaswas wrote:

I once had a squadron of turkeys strafe my old Mini Cooper, just in time for the summer sun to bake it rock hard all day whilst I was at work.

It looked like one of those joke advertising vehicles. A giant heap of guano with wheels.


But you've already mentioned that it was a Mini Cooper. No need to be redundant...
Lordyaswas
 
  2  
Reply Mon 1 Jun, 2015 08:29 pm
@FBM,
My Mini Cooper was only a heap of crap when it went through a puddle and cut out.


Oh, and when half way up a steep hill.


And sudden rain storms.


Hail, light drizzle, mist....well, any kind of humidity I suppose.

Strong winds..... Light winds.......


I see what you mean.
chai2
 
  0  
Reply Mon 1 Jun, 2015 08:33 pm
@Lordyaswas,
What you call turkeys in your country, must not be what we call turkeys here.

Do you mean something like a pheasant?
Lordyaswas
 
  1  
Reply Mon 1 Jun, 2015 08:37 pm
@chai2,
No, it was definitely a dozen or so of these......


http://www.standardmedia.co.ke/images/tuesday/turkey210114.jpg


Nothing else could possibly crap that much.
chai2
 
  1  
Reply Mon 1 Jun, 2015 08:58 pm
@Lordyaswas,
Wow. I didn't think they could fly, they're so big.

I think the one's raised for food here can't do more than waddle around.
Jewels345
 
  0  
Reply Mon 1 Jun, 2015 10:46 pm
@chai2,
Yo can you guys like take your turkey talk to another forum. Lol
Jewels345
 
  0  
Reply Mon 1 Jun, 2015 10:47 pm
@Lordyaswas,
Damn forum people have no chill. Smh
Lordyaswas
 
  1  
Reply Tue 2 Jun, 2015 12:47 am
@Jewels345,
I'm sorry, would you be good enough to repeat that in English?

I'm currently trying to learn yo, both oral and written, but am finding it difficult.
0 Replies
 
 

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