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How do I deal with bullying from my class?

 
 
RyanO45
 
Reply Tue 28 Apr, 2015 04:45 pm
At the moment, things in my life aren't going smoothly right now. I'm getting bullied by my whole class and I've done nothing to deserve this. Everyone has turned on me. Previous friends, people who were never friends, everyone. No one understands my life. I'm always made fun of whenever I do something, I'm left out of conversations, and when the teacher tells us to make groups ourselves, I'm left out because no one is my friend. This might be because I'm different but this shouldn't mean I should be left out and made fun of. I'm also worried that this will continue into high school since most of my class is going to the same high school as I am. How do I handle this situation and is it possible to make friends with them again?
 
jespah
 
  1  
Reply Tue 28 Apr, 2015 04:47 pm
@RyanO45,
This is a pretty vague statement. I doubt you are bullied by absolutely everyone. And if you are, it would have to be for something truly major.

So, what gives?
PUNKEY
 
  1  
Reply Tue 28 Apr, 2015 06:55 pm
Ryan -

It may feel like EVERYONE is against you right now, but you really need to see the situation clearly.

What do you think you could have done that would turn EVERYONE against you? Why would EVERYONE bother?

I know you say you have done nothing, but try to think.
FBM
 
  3  
Reply Tue 28 Apr, 2015 07:12 pm
@RyanO45,
Would you mind filling in some of the details? What do the others think is so different about you? What happened between you and your former friends? Also, try to keep in mind that whatever the situation is, it's temporary. Better days are ahead. Smile
CalamityJane
 
  3  
Reply Tue 28 Apr, 2015 08:14 pm
@RyanO45,
Consult with your teacher and have the entire class involved in a workshop about bullying. Middle school is tough, high school will be better - trust me!
firefly
 
  3  
Reply Wed 29 Apr, 2015 06:32 am
@RyanO45,
It's difficult to give you meaningful advice, RyanO45, without knowing a little more about your situation.
Quote:
Everyone has turned on me. Previous friends, people who were never friends, everyone...

This suggests that things were better in the past. What happened to cause this change in how people are treating you? How long has it been going on?
Quote:
I'm different but this shouldn't mean I should be left out and made fun of.

In what way are you "different"? Is this difference something recent or have you always been "different"?
Quote:
No one understands my life.

Does that include your parents? Have you spoken to them about what you are going through at school?
RyanO45
 
  1  
Reply Wed 29 Apr, 2015 01:50 pm
@jespah,
No one in my class actually respects me for who I am. Just because I play LoL or I'm in cadets doesn't mean this should happen.
0 Replies
 
RyanO45
 
  1  
Reply Wed 29 Apr, 2015 01:53 pm
@PUNKEY,
I have gotten cocky a few times and bragged a few times but when your class is better than you in something like throwing and catching a football, if everyone else can do it better than me and they make fun of me for that, there's a problem. When I do succeed at something, no one really cares on what I did.
0 Replies
 
RyanO45
 
  1  
Reply Wed 29 Apr, 2015 02:03 pm
@firefly,
Quote:
What happened to cause this change in how people are treating you? How long has it been going on?

I don't know how this happened and that's what I'm trying to find out. It's been going on for close to 2 years now.
Quote:
In what way are you "different"? Is this difference something recent or have you always been "different"?

I'm different in a lot of ways. No one might talk to me just because I have no similarities with others in my class. For example, I play League of Legends. Everyone thinks it sucks so I'm made fun of for that. There's only one person in my class that plays but he pretends he doesn't play and makes fun of me too. I go to cadets also. No one else goes to cadets in my class so this is understandable why I'm made fun of but I've told them that cadets is a good program and that they should join and no one cares.
Quote:
Does that include your parents? Have you spoken to them about what you are going through at school?

I have spoken to my parents about what has been happening but they don't get what's happening. My mom takes the most direct approach and tells me to not be friends with them... I'm not, but she won't listen. My dad on the other hand says to stand up for myself. If your whole class is against you, you can't do much about it even if you stand up for yourself.
0 Replies
 
RyanO45
 
  2  
Reply Wed 29 Apr, 2015 02:09 pm
@CalamityJane,
I've spoken to my guidance counselor about this and my teacher. I spoke to my guidance counselor about a case that happened a few weeks ago with me getting bullied. We spoke about it and we got the popular students to come and talk about what was happening since everyone in my class looks up to them. We sorted out some stuffs and over these few weeks, nothing has changed from my class in a good or bad way. My teacher told me we could speak to a social worker and sort things out with the class.
0 Replies
 
ossobuco
 
  1  
Reply Wed 29 Apr, 2015 02:09 pm
I am wondering if you got into this by being sensitive to taunts about your games, when people probably didn't mean they didn't like you at all, just talking a game or games down. You didn't taunt back (or did you?) and probably got defensive, and now find yourself in a strange kind of space.

Actually, they may be interested in stuff you are, games, for example.
RyanO45
 
  1  
Reply Wed 29 Apr, 2015 02:17 pm
@FBM,
I started to realize no one liked me a few months ago. If I look back further, it's been going on for 2 years now. Many people think I'm weird. There are many things that aren't weird about me that people don't realize. Now I feel like I shouldn't share my information with anyone if it makes me sound weird.
Quote:
What happened between you and your former friends?

We weren't even that good of friends. We would just talk, nothing else. And the conversation didn't even go on that long and they would just leave me to talk to other people. It feels like I'm invisible.
Quote:
Better days are ahead.

How? I can't do much myself.
RyanO45
 
  2  
Reply Wed 29 Apr, 2015 02:23 pm
@ossobuco,
I'm a very sensitive person but insults from people across the web don't hurt me as much as insults in front of my face. This might sound really sad but people across the internet who I don't even know, treat me better than my class. I don't taunt others whatsoever. I did brag before but this has changed. I do get cocky though.
0 Replies
 
FOUND SOUL
 
  1  
Reply Wed 29 Apr, 2015 02:25 pm
@RyanO45,
I imagine you absolutely love your games and being a cadet. I wonder with the things that some of your class mates do, whether they actually love doing them or their parents wish for them to do those things and so, they do.

How do they bully you? Do they all bully you or maybe some just ignore as they don't understand or like the things you like if you really look hard at each one.

You know the guy that also likes the game but pretends he doesn't he is hiding behind himself yet you are straight out there being you, which I am sure your parents would be proud of, you should be proud of. Why not try to make friends with him outside of school? Let him know that you know why he is ignoring you but he has the same interests what people don't know they don't know. Then from there have a look around there would be other kids who have simular interests such as the other cadets, see them after school. One day, all of you stand talking together and I am thinking those bullies will then have to bully the lot of you, they won't and hopefully that will be the end of it.
RyanO45
 
  1  
Reply Wed 29 Apr, 2015 02:35 pm
@FOUND SOUL,
Quote:
How do they bully you?

They call me names, imitate me, mock me, insult me.
Quote:
Do they all bully you or maybe some just ignore as they don't understand or like the things you like if you really look hard at each one.

There's a group or gang/clique in my class that plays a lot of video games on Steam. I have Steam too but they don't like me so they won't talk to me whatsoever. The others don't know what's happening in my life.
Quote:
Why not try to make friends with him outside of school?

The friends I do have are all in cadets which I only see once or twice a week. Even then, people are *trying* to bully me there. Luckily, it's only one person and his uniform looks like sh*t.
FOUND SOUL
 
  1  
Reply Wed 29 Apr, 2015 02:47 pm
@RyanO45,
Quote:
The friends I do have are all in cadets which I only see once or twice a week. Even then, people are *trying* to bully me there. Luckily, it's only one person and his uniform looks like sh*t.


Maybe Mum doesn't iron it enough Wink

You have "friends" that's awesome. The kids at school have friends but I bet they talk about each other behind their backs, you know the ones that are talking down to you.

Would you consider asking your Parents to let you go to classes that build confidence?

The fact that you "have" friends means you can make them.

Ask this Forum who wasn't bullied at school, even as a new topic and you will find not many can put their hands up.

Bullies don't bully those that don't let them. I know it's tough but there are ways to change things that we don't like in life.
RyanO45
 
  2  
Reply Wed 29 Apr, 2015 06:29 pm
@FOUND SOUL,
Quote:
Would you consider asking your Parents to let you go to classes that build confidence?

I'm not sure of any in my area but I don't think my parents would let me do so. Asian parents I tell you. They're so overprotective.
So yeah...
0 Replies
 
FBM
 
  2  
Reply Wed 29 Apr, 2015 06:46 pm
@RyanO45,
RyanO45 wrote:

I started to realize no one liked me a few months ago. If I look back further, it's been going on for 2 years now. Many people think I'm weird. There are many things that aren't weird about me that people don't realize. Now I feel like I shouldn't share my information with anyone if it makes me sound weird.



Quote:
Quote:
Better days are ahead.

How? I can't do much myself.


Nothing stays the same for very long is social circles. On the one hand, you can't control what others think, so there's no use in worrying about that. On the other hand, there are things you can do to increase the chances of someone noticing your good qualities.

For example, I gather that you're in middle school, about to head into high school. For someone in middle school, you write exceptionally well. I teach writing, so you can trust me on this. Does your school have a newspaper? Or the high school that you'll be going to? If so, I'd recommend you check into getting on the reporter or editor staff. Writing is one very clear strong point that I can see at this point. You could potentially capitalize on this. Not by setting out to impress anybody, but just by writing well and being in a situation where others will be able to notice it.
0 Replies
 
jespah
 
  3  
Reply Wed 29 Apr, 2015 06:48 pm
Thanks for providing more information.

Eh, name-calling. I recall that happening to me. Not fun at all.

And you're right; they shouldn't treat you badly. I'm glad you've got friends. Even one is helpful.
0 Replies
 
Raveena0619
 
  1  
Reply Sun 13 Sep, 2015 12:33 am
@RyanO45,
I'm so sorry to hear what you're going through!
I can totally relate and I know it's been long since you posted this here but just want to say, I hope things got better? If it hasn't, I have a few suggestions.
I've went through the same but I stood up, walked up to my classmates with my own feet. I didn't wait for anyone to come to me. This helped gradually and people were more open and friendly. You just need to take that step yourself and talk to them! If that doesn't work, let me know, we can work things out together Smile Whenever you're feeling down or depressed, I suggest you talk to someone whether it's a teacher or your mum or dad. I understand it's hard and sometimes, nothing anyone says actually helps but at least talking to someone about how you're feeling helps you a lot! Smile Good luck xx
0 Replies
 
 

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