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Acceptance/Letting Go

 
 
Reply Tue 21 Apr, 2015 05:28 pm
I know a part of Buddhism is about letting go of the things we want in life and accepting our losses and accepting a new life. But, let's pretend, that there was someone who only wanted to live a particular style of life. This is his/her one and only life of good value to him/her and all other styles of life to him/her are of no value to him/her. It would be no different than if someone had a particular style in music and all other styles of music to him/her don't hold any good value to him/her. Therefore, if someone had only one style of life he/she found good value in such as going out and walking in nature, but then developed cancer and was bound to a hospital bed, then this new life of being in that hospital bed would be of no good value to him/her at all since this new life is not his/her style at all. It would be no different than if he/she was listening to music he/she likes (in this case, him/her going out and walking in nature), but then that music he/she likes was taken away from him/her and he/she is now listening to music he/she finds no value in (in this case, him/her being bound in a hospital bed with cancer and living a new life in which he/she can no longer go out in nature anymore). As a matter of fact, it would be him/her now listening to music he/she hates since this is a new life he/she utterly detests.

This person would have every right to end his/her life rather than to just accept it since this life is not his/her style at all as I said before and wasn't the life he/she wanted to live at all. For other people to tell him/her that he/she should just accept this lifestyle and that, even though he/she no longer has the life he/she wanted to live, that he/she should instead live for others, then that would be utterly selfish of these other people to tell him/her so. It says to him/her that only these other people matter now and that he/she should just instead have all the attention, value, and just cater to these people. The fact is, he/she is just as important as any other person and he/she deserves his/her good life that he/she wanted to truly live. He/she has every right to live that life. Therefore, for others to just tell him/her to accept this new life of cancer and just live for others would be denying, demeaning, and restricting of this person's value as a human being which would be his/her right to have his/her good life he/she wants. Therefore, balance is key here. We must have our own good lives we want to live while also living for others and bringing them good lives as well. We must have our good lives and others must have their good lives. Otherwise, we should end our lives and we have every right to end our lives if we could never get our good lives back. We have every right to have our good lives we want to live as long as these are lives that don't harm and demean other innocent people.

You choosing to end your life in the event that you could never regain your good life would not make you selfish at all. For example, with Robin Williams, the good value that he has invested towards the message of living for others, that good value has been redirected towards a new message of value towards his family and other people when he has decided to end his life due to his depression. This new message of value says to his family and other innocent people that he just can't take his depression anymore and that it is just simply time for him to go. That he still has full value towards them anyway even though he knows very well that he will cause them grief in his act of suicide and that he wishes for them to find their own strengths in life without him. Therefore, Robin Williams didn't have any less value towards others in his act of suicide. Instead, his value has been switched over to a new message. The message he has had before was him choosing to live for others. But that message has changed over to that new message I just mentioned here.

I have lost all my feelings of pleasure 24/7 due to anhedonia (absence of pleasure) which is a negative symptom of schizophrenia and I'm not sure I will ever regain my pleasure back. My feelings of pleasure are very profound to me, are the only things that make my personal life good and worth living and nothing else, and are more important than my beating heart and the air I breathe to stay alive. My heart and air keep me physically alive. But my feelings of pleasure keep me alive in the sense of giving my life a sense of good value and worth. Nothing else gives my life a sense of good value and worth. Therefore, I must have my full feelings of pleasure back to me in my life up and running as a full function in my life to keep my life up and running with good value and worth. I am not selfish or anything of the sort when saying that my feelings of pleasure are the only things that give the things I do a sense of good value and worth. I still have full value and compassion towards others and I still help others out. It's just that what makes my own personal life good and worth living is my feelings of pleasure and nothing else. If I have decided to end my life due to my pleasure never recovering, then I would not be having any less value towards others (as demonstrated in my example with Robin Williams). It is only my feelings of pleasure that give my life a sense of good value and worth. Not any other form of pleasure that is so claimed to come from our thoughts and everything else in life alone without our actual feelings of pleasure.

Going back to my music style analogue. When I had my full feelings of pleasure in the past, it was like I was listening to music I like since it was me living a life that was my style. But when I have developed this anhedonia in which there are never any given brief moments of any feelings of pleasure whatsoever, then it is now like I am only listening to music I hate and find no value in since I am now living a life that is not who I am, is not my style at all, is a life I find no good value in whatsoever without my feelings of pleasure, and is a lifestyle I will never accept.
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PUNKEY
 
  2  
Reply Tue 21 Apr, 2015 06:46 pm
I'm sure you had a moment of pleasure and accomplishment after being able to write down all this - and share your thoughts with other people.

A big service of Buddhism is to alleviate the sufferings of others. Suicide hurts others, especially family members. A true Buddhist would never kill him/herself.
MozartLink
 
  1  
Reply Tue 21 Apr, 2015 06:57 pm
@PUNKEY,
Then don't even consider me a Buddhist then. Just consider me an innocent human being who deserves his full life of pleasure since he is just as important as any other person.
0 Replies
 
Frank Apisa
 
  1  
Reply Wed 22 Apr, 2015 05:18 am
You must be great fun at a party!
MozartLink
 
  1  
Reply Wed 22 Apr, 2015 09:51 am
@Frank Apisa,
What I'm trying to do here is make people realize that nothing they can tell me can ever change my immense value towards my pleasure. That I can never find other things of good value to live for in my life without my feelings of pleasure and that I would never accept and would never live a life without my feelings of pleasure. I want them to no longer try to convince me that there are other good things I can live for and to no longer convince me that I can still find worth and such in this life without my feelings of pleasure. If they do try to convince me, then I post these long-winded refutations in return so that they realize that there is truly no reason for me to find worth and good value in my own personal life without my feelings of pleasure. I want these people to instead respond to me in such a way that says: "I see. I realize that your feelings of pleasure are the one and only things of good value to you in your personal life and just how much you must have them back. I will no longer try to convince you otherwise and I fully respect your hedonistic values." My feelings of pleasure are all that matter to me in terms of my own personal life and nothing else will ever matter to me in terms of my own personal life I live for myself.

If they are people who call me selfish, disrespect me, call me a crybaby, etc., then the same thing also applies. I will post long-winded refutations to these people and their claims that I am selfish and such so that they have full respect and compassion towards me and respect my hedonistic values and no longer call me such names anymore or mock me in any other given way. In other words, I just want these types of people to be quiet and to respect my hedonistic values. If these people insist on calling me names anyway and in displaying a tonality towards me that I deem as disrespect, then I will become abusive towards these people.
Frank Apisa
 
  1  
Reply Wed 22 Apr, 2015 11:07 am
@MozartLink,
Post shorter, more coherent thoughts, Mozart...and you will not have to explain what you are trying to do.

We be able to tell.

As respectfully as I can say this...your posts are an abomination.
MozartLink
 
  1  
Reply Wed 22 Apr, 2015 04:08 pm
@Frank Apisa,
How are they an abomination?
Frank Apisa
 
  1  
Reply Wed 22 Apr, 2015 04:18 pm
@MozartLink,
Because you try to cover too much at one time...rather than building your case (whatever it is) slowly and logically...in increments.

I still do not know what your main contention is.
0 Replies
 
PUNKEY
 
  1  
Reply Thu 23 Apr, 2015 05:58 am
His contention is: "I'll show you, I'm going to hold my own breath.'

MozartLink
 
  1  
Reply Thu 23 Apr, 2015 06:16 am
@PUNKEY,
Also, what I said could very well be false. But even so, even if it were somehow proven to me that my life can still be good and worth living without my feelings of pleasure, I still personally would have no sense of good value and worth in my life anyway without my feelings of pleasure. Therefore, I would present these false-intellectual long-winded arguments to others anyway in order to try and convince them anyway so that they will be on my side and agree and respect me. People might at first have every reason to call me selfish and a crybaby. But if I can keep on presenting these types of arguments to these people, then it just might get to the point where these people will say to me: "Fine. I will no longer call you these names and will no longer have a disrespectful tone towards you. I can't prove or disprove the things you are saying and neither can I prove what I'm saying is true or not. So we will just go about our own lives and I will respect your hedonistic values and you will just let me be, let me live my life, and respect my ways of living." That was all I was asking from you and other people. This is not my way of seeking any self-pity or being a selfish crybaby. It is my way of saying to you and others: "My pleasure is my own personal life here and you better respect that. It is my own personal life I came here for and came here to live. If you don't respect that, then you have it coming and I will become violent and abusive towards you and others who do dare mock and insult me by calling me names and saying things to me such as "Boohoo, stop being a pity pot and stop being a crybaby and just abandon your values and life of pleasure and do something with your life instead."

Now you then might say something to me such as that me living for pleasure is no different than rodents living to get pleasure simulations off of electrodes or people just living to rely on junk food or a bag of chips to make their lives good, worth living, and to define their goals and dreams as being good and worth living for. But you would be attributing a false idea (personality) here to feelings of pleasure in saying that they are not that great and don't define our lives. They are very profound feelings and life dependent for me. They are the only things that allow me to experience the greatness and beauty of this life, nature, my composing dream, and my compositions. Otherwise, all that is experienced for me in my life without my feelings of pleasure is nothing more than just thoughts. Nothing more than just a thinking experience. It is all nothing more than the experience of a thought of greatness and beauty and not the actual experience of greatness and beauty.

Here's what it is like. If I were to have my full feelings of pleasure in my life and I were to go into a beautiful place, then it would be like "WOW, THIS PLACE IS SO BEAUTIFUL!!!" But without my feelings of pleasure, then it is just a thought. It is just some bland and neutral tonality that says "Wow, this place is so beautiful." That's all it is is just a thought (the thinking experience) and is no experience of any motivation, inspiration, awe, wonder, joy, happiness, peace, etc.

One last thing here is that I am not a part of humanity. I live by my own hedonistic rules and defined good in life which would be my feelings of pleasure. I do not live by the loathsome and disrespectful rules of others who call me a crybaby, selfish, and that I should just stop feeling sorry for myself and instead abandon my life of pleasure and live for other things instead and for me to instead have good value towards other things in terms of my own personal life I live for myself. So you might now be asking me why should you live by my own rules of respect then? It would be because this rule of disrespect is universal in that it applies to everyone. I gave an example with how that is with Hitler and the Jews. You shouldn't disrespect anyone. Saying that you have the right to disrespect someone whether they be innocent people you know or don't know would be no different than saying that Hitler had every right to disrespect the Jews and to slaughter them while I'm at it.

The only part of humanity I am a part of would be those types of people who do have full compassion and respect towards my hedonistic values and such who have no scorn or disrespect towards me. These would be people such as my mom and therapist.

Also, what I'm saying regarding feelings of pleasure being the only good thing in life really can't be proven as true or false. It could really have the strong chance of being true.
0 Replies
 
Frank Apisa
 
  1  
Reply Thu 23 Apr, 2015 06:19 am
@PUNKEY,
PUNKEY wrote:

His contention is: "I'll show you, I'm going to hold my own breath.'




You may be right.

I doubt I'll ever find out. He is much too wordy...even for a wordy person like myself.
0 Replies
 
PUNKEY
 
  1  
Reply Thu 23 Apr, 2015 07:28 am
"That was all I was asking from you and other people. '

Why do you need validation from other people.?

You give all your power away when you do this. No wonder you feel helpless and/or depressed/angry!

Your pleasure will come from within. No need to convince anyone else.

PS WHOM are you allowing to hold you back?
0 Replies
 
 

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