Should you offer a book to your friends?

Forums: Philosophy, Morality, Ethics, Friends, Generosity
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The other day I was waiting in the queue outside an ATM when I bumped into two friends of mine. They told me they were headed to a book store To buy this textbook which I needed to buy too. I was planning on going here myself. When we got there he asked for the textbook and the shopkeeper handedd it to him and quoted a certain price. He started complaining about the prices of books and I agreed with him. He asked for three copies of the textbook. I suddenly turnedd to the shopkeeper and asked if he happened to have a used book and he said he had only one copy but it was almost half the price of the brand new book. I ponderedd if it was right for a moment and handed in the required amount. Should I have offeredd them the book? Should I have offeredd to leave it to chance, say flip a coin or play rock paper scissors ??

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Type: Question • Score: 12 • Views: 2,145 • Replies: 17
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@Mithrandir,

Nope. It's called initiative. You used yours and got yourself a bargain.
Your friends will no doubt ask for a used book in future.

Those who don't ask, don't get. You asked.

Unless you're British or Canadian of course. If this is the case, you must apologize profusely and give your friend the difference in cash, before apologising once more and offering to keep the tatty book.

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@Mithrandir,

I agree with LordA.

However, I view this with an eye towards a cultural difference (I'm in USA). You might feel awkward. You took the initiative and they didn't.

My experience has led me to always asking for a used version, but this begs the point.

You were the only one who asked for a used copy. You are entitled to the book. Furthermore, there may be other local book stores where your friends can seek out and purchase other used books. Plus there's the also searching on the Internet and Amazon to purchase other used versions.

Your friends still have other opportunities to find their used versions. Why not suggest that to them?

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@Mithrandir,

you asked for a used book - you found a used book - it's yours

____

keep in mind that a lot of people won't buy a used book even if offered

____

the book is yours, fair and square

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@Mithrandir,

Mithrandir wrote:

Should I have offered them the book?

Why would you do that? That would be taking self-effacement too far. It's nice when people aren't pushy and greedy, but there is no need to totally sacrifice yourself. Ask yourself whether any of them would have first, even thought to ask for a used book, and second, having secured the only one, offered it to you?

Quote:

Should I have offered to leave it to chance, say flip a coin or play rock paper scissors ??

No. Again, why? It wasn't "chance" that got you the cheaper book. It was initiative that you clearly possess and they don't.

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@Mithrandir,

I was walking down some railroads tracks with a couple of homeys once, and spotted a $20 bill off to the side of the track, which I quickly retrieved.

Then my homeys told me, in no uncertain terms, that the only "fair" thing to do was split it 3 ways.

When I asked why that would be "fair," they said it was because they were with me when I saw it.

I laughed in their sorry faces. I don't think so! Homey don't play dat.

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I agree with the others - you asked so you got it. Now they only way I could see that you should have offerred to your friends is if say you have lots of money and could easily afford a regular book and your friends were not well off -- then it would make sense to offer to them.

Also, I tend to put myself in the other person's shoes. So say the opposite happened and one of friend's asked and bought the used book. Would you be upset at them? Myself, I wouldn't be -- I'd think smart guy wished I thought of that - and now I learned something --- next time I will ask.

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@Mithrandir,

Well, Grey Wanderer, if you were merely a mortal man like the rest of us, I would agree with what the others are saying. But it's up to Istari like yourself to set a nobler standard for Middle Earth to aspire to. Blush for shame! The Dark Lord's reach has grown long indeed! Mad

1 Reply

@Kolyo,

"The Dark Lord's reach has grown long indeed! "

Which comes in very handy on crowded tube trains.

Once the injunction has been lifted, of course.

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@Lordyaswas,

Quote:

Once the injunction has been lifted, of course.

Yeah, right, eh? Like they would EVER lift the injunction against pervs like you, eh? I don't think so! Homey don't play dat.

1 Reply

@layman,

It has been known in the past, y'know.

OK, I was known in the papers for a while as the bobbing rambler, but a false beard and walking stick later and I walked out of court a free man.

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@Lordyaswas,

As someone from overseas, I have been very grateful when English friends gave me "The Polite Tourist". (But that was in vain, since 40 years earlier I'd already got "1066 and all that")

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@Mithrandir,

I'm curious where you go to school where you wouldn't be getting your reference texts online.

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@layman,

layman wrote:

I laughed in their sorry faces. I don't think so! Homey don't play dat.

I know I have not always agreed with you but you were absolutely right.

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You took the initiative and got a cheaper, used book, while your friends were wasting their and the booksellers time complaining about about the overall high prices of text books.

Yes, I'm sure the bookseller has never had anyone complain about the high prices before. That's because if he had he would have immediately made all the textbook publishing companies lower their prices.

While they whined to someone about thing the person had no power over, you were proactive and did something about it. Kudos to you for getting to the nut of the matter.

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@Mithrandir,

As a question of morality - you did the right thing.

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@Lordyaswas,

Not at all. You asked, you got, you keep. Don't sell yourself short for anyone.

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@Linkat,

I don't believe she should sacrifice what she asked for just because she is well off and they aren't. She would end up with nothing and they would have it all. Just a thought, not being rude.

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Should you offer a book to your friends?

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