I want to believe

Don't just show up at a church. (a) They're really boring. (b) People will naturally indoctrinate you in the things they believe in.

Start off by reading some books on religion, and I don't mean the bible or koran.

Study the histories, beliefs, requirements.

You don't have to belong to a religion to have belief you know.

Meaning, Zk, is unnecessary. I live for Tuesday pm, 3 exotic imported brews and Monday the serving of cheese popcorn

If you still feel uneasy a number of OC substances will provide relief very economically

Not to act as a devil's advocate (no pun intended) but why turn to religion? You could be depressed or simply in a rut. Have you thought about counseling? Is that a possibility? Are you in a relationship now? Do you have any kids?

Getting educated about religion could be a matter of going to the library or bookstore. Are you missing the feeling of belonging to a community of some sort?

Why not find an activity, project or volunteer your services to the community? Perhaps you can take a trip or vacation and visit someplace you always wanted to go to? How about a visit to some old friends or family members whom you haven't been in touch with though you've meant to?

Are any of these activities a possibility?

I understand your feeling. The necessity of feeling that spiritual void is part of the nature of us humans. It is unavoidable. Seeking for a self meaning is a noble quest. That is how religions where bor initially.

I was raised a catholic. I cant talk very good of my religion since they have commited a lot of mistakes. At least on my community other branches of christians are well known for not being very trustable. It is true, most religions adoctrinate at the first sight of a non beliver.

I honestly recommend you approach buddhism. They are fine people, they never try to adoctrinate. They teach love and comprehension of the self being. Its a good way to start, from there you can learn more about yourself an then move to another religion that fits your inner self.

Cheese popcorn....mmmmm....

Thank You. I appreciate your advice. I think I will look into it. I wish that I wasn't so afraid. I'm not even sure what I'm afraid of, it's weird.

It's good to study the whys and why nots of various religions. It's crucial though to read unbiased scholarly material. Be careful to avoid books that bash baptists or Lutherans, or any denomination. My personal opinion is that every organization has good and bad people. I was raised Catholic, but many members of my family belong to other denominations. I have attended services in damn near ever place you can think of, however I don't attend any particular church any longer.

I agree with Ragman, church or synagogue may not be what you need. It could be depression, or a need to meet more people. If you are interested in politics, participate with your preferred one. I'm not saying you shouldn't go to church, but it is a tad intimidating to walk into a place you've never been and hope you are not conspicuous.

How believing works is that you reach the conclusion by a way of choosing the answer, resulting in an opinion. (as distinct from being forced to a conclusion by evidence, resulting in a fact). The painting is either beautiful or ugly, you reach the conclusion about it by expression of your emotions with free will.

If you choose the conclusion that the painting is ugly, then you are saying you have hate in your heart, which chose the words that it is ugly.

The meaning of this is, that the existence of the hate in your heart must be regarded as a matter of opinion, in order for it to be true that what is ugly or beautiful is a matter of opinion. So to say the painting is ugly, is to say you *believe* you have hate in your heart for the painting.

So you see believing is an opinion on what it is that makes a decision turn out the way it does. Who are you as being the owner of your decisions? That question is a matter of opinion, you can only reach a conclusion about it, by choosing it.

That is how subjectivity works, believing. You can practise that, in regards to other people. Look objectively in a matter of fact way to discover how they choose, and then you look subjectively, forming an opinion, about who the other is as being the owner of all those decisions.

If you have no religious training, you would want to not start with belief in God the holy spirit, but start with belief in the existence of the plain human spirit first.

Believe in self. Love and happiness are out there when you achieve infinite happiness you will be like god, believe that.

Forget "religion" for a moment. That's a set of beliefs and practices.
It needs some foundation to rest on.

Do you believe in God?

Great advice and question George.

Cuts to the heart of the matter.

I have a hard time believing in something I know nothing about. So the answer to that question would be no.

So you think you will believe in God if you go to a church?

I think you've heard enough people say going to a particular church is not the way to go.

Why not do some internet reasearch, go to the library, bookstores, etc?

Honestly, you are not going to suddenly believe in God because you're sitting in a room with some other people, and someone is standing up front giving a sermon.

The reason I ask is that belief in God is something that starts from within.
It is something very basic, a response that is formed before any analysis.
You believe first, then you try to figure out the whats and the whys and
what to do about it.

Or not. I see the same world, have had almost the same education, secular
and religious, as my friend Tom. I believe in God. He does not. Nothing I
could say would make him believe. Nothing he could say would make me
stop believing.

Your answer makes me think that no matter which or how many churches
you go to, your final conclusion will be the same, that there is no God.

I really don't want my life to have meaning.

It's sort of just like, meaning to what though? It's embarrassing. Meaning to...stupidity. I'm trying to get people to get away from me who have uncontrollable obsessed feelings and thoughts about me: relativity; no real reason for it yet.

I went away. They literally followed me-the only thing that happened when I "ran away" is the alleged reason for the following changed entirely.

I don't want these people knowing about me when I die. It's unnatural. It will disturb my grave; trying to make me a public person too, is their last resort: what you don't want to be when you die. Trust me.

Who are they anyway but the less evolved. They're literally "bad people." Just be on with it. You don't want bad people knowing you, or their thoughts. The Opposite: I wish they would stop spreading gossip but that's what they do. You'll go down with them, to Hell.

They just want to waste your time, and there is no reason for your life to have meaning, with them, truly, you don't want that. Seriously. It's basically that they are really bad people, in general; they are subhuman, in a lot of ways, and they are just bad.

Ok that's church. That's Jesus actually. Have a nice day.

That really makes sense to me. I feel like the idea of there being a god is far fetched. Im thinking that I feel that way because I am very uneducated about religion. My thoughts about going to church was that maybe I could speak with a pastor or someone and have some things explained to me. I know that going to church isnt going to make me magically believe.

Trying to sort through all this is very difficult. I appreciate your comments.

When you are not religious then you become the victim of original sin. Original sin is when you regard what is good, loving and beautiful as a matter of fact, instead of as a matter of opinion.

So for instance you take it as fact that money is good, and physically looking a certain way is good, and then you start calculating what to do based on this knowledge of good and evil. To insert factual certitude into a matter of opinion releases the body's own drugs called endorphins, it makes you feel high (or low), it is very addictive. And then the calculations of what is good and evil start to take over your life. That you want more money because it gives you a high, rather than that it makes you happy. That you make your looks more perfect because it makes you high.
Which means you have to choose to reach a conclusion about what is good, loving and beautiful, not take it as fact. Similarly you have to choose whether or not God exists, expressing your emotions with free will. The spiritual domain chooses the way the material domain turns out, and it is a matter of opinion what is in the spiritual domain and a matter of fact what is in the material domain. So you search with your heart all what is in the spiritual domain, find God there, or not.

What a load of utter bullshit.

Total self delusion.