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Black Piece

 
 
SCoates
 
Reply Wed 12 May, 2004 06:15 pm
Edit: Moderator: Moved from Poetry. The Poetry forum is for others' poetry; your original poetry goes in Original Writing.

I fear I'll write a black piece; shining on the dew,
Mellowed without color, textured without hue,
A time appears where no one feels the absence of the night.

To title it, to render it, the praiser opens lies,
It covers but a scant response, as much it loosely pries.
And the silent breath of twilight are but hollow distant stars.

A lifetime of ambition, not a moment of regret,
For this is not our lifetime, but a lifetime we'll forget.
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Type: Discussion • Score: 1 • Views: 686 • Replies: 4
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JoanneDorel
 
  1  
Reply Thu 13 May, 2004 04:07 am
Wow, SCoates night time and awake and alone you are lucky you can write it down so clearly.
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Letty
 
  1  
Reply Sat 15 May, 2004 05:16 am
S.C. A stunning poem. I especially like the title--Black Piece. I also like the way you deviate from the rhyme scheme with "...lies; pries, and stars. It's quite refreshing.

The theme is melancholy, but that is what catches a reader's attention, and it is what helps us cleanse our soul.

You are an amazing young man, S.C. Keep writing!

Good morning,
From Florida.
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cavfancier
 
  1  
Reply Sat 15 May, 2004 05:28 am
I really like it, SCoates.
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edgarblythe
 
  1  
Reply Sat 15 May, 2004 08:03 am
intriguing
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