@neologist,
I know for one thing, we can choose to sooth our minds with the idea that there is no eternal fire and live happily ever after. However, the scriptures concerning the Rich man and Lazarus compel us to live in such a manner that we certainly don't find out the hard way whether there is a hell with fire or not.
Always erring on the side of the worst case scenario seems to be a safer bet than to adopt the nonchalant attitude of those who deny its very existence.
There have been many throughout history that have discounted realities due to some ideology or another. In the end the truth always prevails.
I just find it really hard to believe that Jesus our Lord would make mention of hell in the manner that He did if it were nothing more than the grave. The Apostle Paul speaks of the victory that Jesus had over death, hell and the grave. Are these all one in the same or are they three distinct places for the departed from the earth?
I would suggested that you take the scriptures in their entirety and not discount what is written on the paper.