boughten love

What do you want from me?
I feel, but I cannot give.
I try, but I can't live
with you knowing I did it for you.
That is something I will not go through.
I can't, I try, but I won't.
Do you deserve it, I ask myself.
My mind says look in different directions,
but my heart feels stability with this.
This is not the way love holds on.
I use you for the things you do.
You do everything for me
and only ask to be loved in return.
I'm sorry, I can't love you, not for this.
I want a real man.
Not someone who is whatever I want you to be.
You are not your own person, you are mine.
And it's sick.