Chick-fil-A, Facebook, and etiquette

There is no right or wrong but I snicker every time I hear 'foy-ER'.

We could share a garden salad without dressing while watching a bunch of bigots kill themselves with overdoses of sodium and cholesterol. What could be more uplifting?

The next chapter in the national debate over Chick-fil-A and its chief executive's opposition to gay marraige comes Friday, when gay rights activists are planning a "kiss in" event.

Activists are planning a "National Same-Sex Kiss Day at Chick-fil-A" on Friday. As part of the event, couples are encouraged to go one of the chicken restaurant's locations and take a photo or video of themselves kissing.

"Let's show Chick-fil-A thanks for their support of Love, Equality, and the Real Definition of Marriage! Invite your friends!" organizers said on its Facebook page.

The move comes after thousands of restaurant supporters came out to back the CEO's stance. In some cases, there were long lines at locations.

Vicki Parsons, a Tustin resident who runs a small Internet technology company in Santa Ana, stood in line with her daughter for an hour and 10 minutes at a Costa Mesa location but said it was well worth the wait.
"The ability for a company to be able to believe what they want to believe and still have their doors open to whoever wants to or chooses to give their business -- that's why I'm here," she said. "Yes, I am a Christian, but my strongest support stems from being a business owner. I want to believe what I want to believe and not be condemned for what I believe, and give people the freedom of choice, if they want to do business with us."

Newport Beach resident Ian Conger cited both business and religion as his reasons for dining Wednesday at the relatively new Costa Mesa location.

"This company is family-owned, and they're putting their money where they want to, and that's their right," he said. "Nobody should tell someone how they should spend their money. God is very good to my wife and I, and I feel God's going to be with us through this and he'll be with the opposer as well. He doesn't hate anybody."

Lake Forest resident Deanna Kirchen stood in line with her children to support the restaurant for religious reasons.

"I've been in line for over an hour, and I'm only about three-quarters of the way through," she said. "I'm hungry and yes, we came here for lunch, but I wanted to support Chick-fil-A for having the cojones to stand up for biblical values."

Chick-fil-A drew criticism after Chief Executive Dan Cathy recently said he and his company were against gay marriage. The comments drew strong reactions, with customers pledging to boycott the chain and some mayors proclaiming they would not allow Chick-fil-A to open in their cities.

In response, former Arkansas Gov. Mike Huckabee declared Wednesday to be Chick-fil-A Appreciation Day, calling on people to eat at the restaurant to show support.

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But, Chick-Fil-A has, in fact, been known to fund groups that are explicitly anti-gay. Groups that have been classified as "hate groups." So, when you prop up your baby with a Chick-Fil-A cup on her car seat, just how do you expect your gay relative to react to that?

Yes, you have the right to do that. You have the right to eat their waffle fries. But, dear God, why? Why do you feel compelled to do so, when you know it causes pain? How is that loving your neighbor, your relative, your friend?

A friend of mine(1) suggested a metaphor I am sure will anger many. But, to me, it rings deeply true. In a way, Chick-Fil-A has become something of a "Confederate Flag."

Bear with me...

Sure, it's just a flag. You say you see it as a symbol of "states rights" or your own history. But most Americans have come to understand that this flag also has painful and hurtful association. And while some still fly it with some kind of strange "pride," many others choose not to, out of respect for the human beings that are harmed by it's message.

But I am also drawn to another painful time, when fear was thick in the air, and people felt the need to take misguided action in defense of…something….

As I think of Chick-Fil-A, I also remember The Dixie Chicks. Remember that mess? Recall the vitriol spilled out at them? The death threats? Radio stations and large multinational media companies sponsored parties where people brought their Dixie Chick CDs, piled them high, and ran over them with a tractor.

And for what?

Because, apparently, in that case "free speech" was not a right for The Dixie Chicks. But it is now?
Huh...

Please note: in both cases…Chick-Fil-A and The Dixie Chicks…it is a lethal combination of conservative religion and politics driving the events as they unfolded. Let's be clear, "Chick-Fil-A Appreciation Day" did not happen without the driving power of conservative politics and religion.

Mike Huckabee is to Chick-Fil-A what Clear Channel was to the Dixie Chicks. Those with ears, let them hear.

I mean, just look around you. Look at what both sides are actually doing. Do you see gay people piling up Chick-Fil-A bags and setting them on fire? Running over them with a backhoe?

Of course you don't.

In fact, quite the opposite. All you hear folks saying "Show your support for LGBT persons: Don't eat there." That's it.

All we are saying --LGBT folks, and their allies like me-- is this: know that this company's policies, the statements of their leader, speak of real harm done to real human beings. This is far beyond the free speech of one man, or one company. The Chick-Fil-A founder has every right to his opinion. And, I suppose you can go eat there, if you like.

But, why? Why do it?

If Chick-Fil-A = The Confederate Flag, then why do it?

Waving that flag, scarfing that sandwich, are about more than just free speech. They are about how we choose to love (or not love) our neighbors as ourselves. They are about seeing all Americans as your neighbors. The true Christian way would be to avoid harmful, hurtful actions...even if you don't agree with homosexuality.

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Set is my facebook friend but probably has me on ultra secret double ignore because of my beer-sotted nights when I insist on posting too many youtube music videos... I lose more friends that way.... hahaha