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MOTHERS WORDS

 
 
joe1949
 
Reply Wed 18 Feb, 2004 01:19 pm
A candle, flickers in the night,
The decision is hers to make
Is it worth it, her thoughts say,
So much violence and pain.

Just a girl, a tender age
Nervous tension, its not to late
Take your children leave this hell
His evil you dread.

Its time for you to think of your health,
Those kids are your life,
Start anew, there's someone out there,
He will love you and treat you right.

With arms to hold you, and keep you safe
Remember Mothers words
A broken lady in the end
Trying to save her marriage.

What a price, she paid
To die at his hands
Evil gun rage.
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Letty
 
  1  
Reply Wed 18 Feb, 2004 03:56 pm
Joe, you really get better with each poem. There are some punctuation errors, but the verse is scary enough that the effect of it drives everything else from the mind. Abuse--evil concept and you dealt with it in a powerful manner. Your poem reminds me of Alice Cooper's "Only Women Bleed." That's the only song by him, that I ever really thought was good.
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joe1949
 
  1  
Reply Wed 18 Feb, 2004 06:11 pm
thanks Letty. I am trying to write in a wider range and style. I do remember Alice Cooper's song, it was his best.
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Letty
 
  1  
Reply Wed 18 Feb, 2004 06:22 pm
Joe, I invited someone who shares your heritage. It's not just I who appreciates your butterfly emerging from the cocoon. Cockney Sparrer sees the kith and kin.
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InTraNsiTiOn
 
  1  
Reply Wed 18 Feb, 2004 08:51 pm
Hey joe, havn't seen you around for awhile. Anyways i like this peom, it has a very intense feel. Lookin forward to the next one!
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joe1949
 
  1  
Reply Thu 19 Feb, 2004 03:56 pm
Thanks to you both for your kind words, they mean so much. I am learning as I go along. It is good to know that people like yourselfs give me so much encouragement.
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