The Phone Call ...

Hi, Amelia,

How very tragic. Is this poem based on a true event? You have a feel for verse, Amelia. I would make one suggestion, however. In the second stanza where you ask"... what caused that emotion...", I would use a different line, because it is obvious why your friend is hurting and in shock.

Please continue using your skills here on A2K.

Thank you, Letty, for taking the time to comment on this.

Yes, this did really happen and this poem just poured out of me onto A2K.

I agree that it is obvious what would cause the shock and hurt. What I failed to do was clarify that...probably because I was in shock...that I wanted to deal with his feelings of shame.

Maybe:


My friend called me up today
He won't be here, I'm sad to say
A hasty trip he can't avoid
My friend's cousin has just died

I heard his tears as he tried to talk
Why must shame be part of his shock
You see, my friend won't be here as planned
His cousin has died by his own hand

Letty, would you mind provding further critique/advice? Thank you!

Ah, Amelia. I love it just the way it is.

Yes, I know that situation well. For the longest time, I hated to answer the phone; afraid that another of our friends had done themselves in.

I wrote an original song for Pete someone here. Keep it up, Amelia.

Thank you, Letty, that is so much more than I expected and means a lot to me.

I hope I'm not intruding, but I know nothing of 'Pete'. Would you tell me; or PM me...and try to find the song?

Thanks!

Indeed I will, Amelia. The anniversary of his death is approaching. He was just a kid. Only 19 years old.

Tomorrow then. It seems that poets and musicians are one and the same.

Merry Christmas, Amelia.

Merry Christmas, Letty.