enturkey - to keep someone locked in a small cage until Christmas
yukcentre- the pub near the slimming club on a hot night.
curtsyknee - affliction caused by genuflection
runtycheeks--chubby ladies with cheerful expressions.
sucke-the-ryng - mediaeval game of ill repute involving lads and lasses
cao - a Portuguese bovid
cako- a jocular term for the Spanish ship, Cacafuego, captured by Sir Francis Drake on March 1st 1579.
tacko - slang name for a cheap TexMex food outlet
cokcat--a cheap crispy chocolate biscuit sold with the slogan "Have a bake have a cokcat."
catsock - a fairly mild blow which liberates a chair from the tyranny of a feline
tacosick- the state of a chap who has had enough for one weekend.
cocaskirt - female drug addict
crotchaski- a neglected Russian prostitute.
oinkscratch - to fondle a pig for the pleasure of both
sackitchporn- what I'm told cheap hotels near airports provide to amuse those guests who have difficulty getting off to sleep.
Ofit- a spray used in cheap hotels near airports to camouflage the more obvious effects of previous sackitchporn.
tofix - sticky toffee that can be used in an emergency to mend punctures
foitex- a substance derived from oil which is used to stuff the pillows of the poor.
existfo - asking the age old question why is something there
sexifoot - the beauty pageant for fetishists.
froxotise - to change a tomboy or ladette into a lady
Shootfixer-- barrack room slang for a bawd.
