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Fri 12 Dec, 2003 08:37 pm
W C Fields said -
(Asked if he believed in clubs for women, Fields responded:) "Yes, if every other form of persuasion fails."
All the men in my family were bearded, and most of the women.
Back in my rummy days, I would tremble and shake for hours upon arising. It was the only exercise I got.
Charlie McCarthy: "Say, Mr. Fields, I read in the paper where you consumed two quarts of liquor a day. What would your father think about that?" WC: "He'd think I was a sissy."
Horse sense is the thing a horse has which keeps it from betting on people.
I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.
I don't believe in dining on an empty stomach.
I once spent a year in Philadelphia, I think it was on a Sunday.
If at first you don't succeed, try again. Then quit. There's no use being a xxxx about it.
i was charging up San Juan Hill and I was struck by a
PRO JECK TILE
Fortunately it was deflec ted by my bandolier of budweiser
Stranded on the desert without a drop of liquor - Was forced to survive on food and water for several days - -
WHY WAIT FOR TO-MORROW AND WASTE A BEAUTIFUL DAY.
A person only thinks he needs money to survive
usually when he has none
Is it true that he had carved on his tombstone
On the whole, I'd rather be in Philadelphia
?
I always thought it was "I'd rather be here than in Philadelphia."
All things considered, I'd rather be in Philadelphia.
That's how I remember it.
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