Two Paths, which one????

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So this is going to be short and simple. I have an issue. I am currently going to be a Junior in College to add some background of mine. I am a musician which is what I study at school but what I want to do the rest of my life is to detach myself from society and live somewhere in the world where I have to completely make things myself. In other words, I want to live in the wild. Don't ask me why, it's just what I want. This is my situation, it seems that my life is heading very straight upwards as of now as a musician but to be honest, the only thing holding me back from leaving everything and going away is my family. Just because I love them and I guess I feel as though I would let them down if I did this. My mother already knows of this but she is scared. I really don't even know what to think anymore, what does someone do in a situation where they want something so bad when at the same time something just as great is holding them back?

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@tkdboy 14,

You could always compromise slightly and visit the folks occasionally. It would be cruel to utterly abandon a mother. I personally think that we are social beings. Even if one lives more isolated and independent than most, one probably still needs some amount of human connection.

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@tkdboy 14,

When I was in my late teens I was determined to do the same thing. It never came to anything, though. I think, in hindsight, I was trying to get away from the identity that had been forecast for me. I did that, although finding an alternative ID has been very difficult. I'm doing a nine-to-five office job for the rest of my working life, in all likelihood.

Actually I wanted to be a musician. But I never got to square one, not because of lack of talent, but because I started late, and had no career path or way into the game. (Have a listen. None of it ever really been published and anyway is all out of fashion nowadays.)

Anyway, don't do anything rash. Life is long and the choices you make now might have consequences that last a lifetime. And be absolutely sure you are not just running away from yourself.

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@tkdboy 14,

tkdboy_14;168000 wrote:

So this is going to be short and simple. I have an issue. I am currently going to be a Junior in College to add some background of mine. I am a musician which is what I study at school but what I want to do the rest of my life is to detach myself from society and live somewhere in the world where I have to completely make things myself. In other words, I want to live in the wild. Don't ask me why, it's just what I want. This is my situation, it seems that my life is heading very straight upwards as of now as a musician but to be honest, the only thing holding me back from leaving everything and going away is my family. Just because I love them and I guess I feel as though I would let them down if I did this. My mother already knows of this but she is scared. I really don't even know what to think anymore, what does someone do in a situation where they want something so bad when at the same time something just as great is holding them back?

You can live by yourself in the wild, but i assure you that you will surely die. If you persist in your commitment to this venture, even after knowing that you will surely die, then i wish you luck.

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@tkdboy 14,

Even Thoreau left his cabin on the lake from time to time. Being a musician seems to imply that the music be shared at some time, although perhaps composed in isolation (as with any art). Isn't the real goal to be able to have isolation when you want and need it, but also have enough balance in your life to have companionship too?

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@TuringEquivalent,

TuringEquivalent;168017 wrote:

You can live by yourself in the wild, but i assure you that you will surely die. If you persist in your commitment to this venture, even after knowing that you will surely die, then i wish you luck.

We all will, surely, die and we persist in our other commitments.

What's stopping you from visiting your folks tkd?

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@jeeprs,

jeeprs;168006 wrote:

When I was in my late teens I was determined to do the same thing. It never came to anything, though. I think, in hindsight, I was trying to get away from the identity that had been forecast for me. I did that, although finding an alternative ID has been very difficult. I'm doing a nine-to-five office job for the rest of my working life, in all likelihood.

Actually I wanted to be a musician. But I never got to square one, not because of lack of talent, but because I started late, and had no career path or way into the game. (Have a listen. None of it ever really been published and anyway is all out of fashion nowadays.)

Anyway, don't do anything rash. Life is long and the choices you make now might have consequences that last a lifetime. And be absolutely sure you are not just running away from yourself.

What I really feel inside is not that I am running away from myself but instead I am running towards myself. I just don't like the repetitiveness of life in this social aspect. I do not see myself working a 9-5 job for the rest of my life, whatever makes somebody happy huh Smile

. anyways I understand that whatever I choose if I do go into the wild then yes, eventually I will die and so life goes on and I will be forgotten in the years ahead. Also it does not have to be the wild, I was thinking like a monastery or something like that, but since I am not hanging onto any religion, a monastery is hard to find. If anyone has any info on monasteries that are not religious but rather spiritual I would greatly appreciate that information. As for right now, any other thoughts, I THANK YOU!

---------- Post added 05-24-2010 at 06:17 PM ----------

mister kitten;168268 wrote:

We all will, surely die, and we persist in our other commitments.

What's stopping you from visiting your folks tkd?

You know, just the fact that I truly feel and know deep inside that in my parents point of view I would most likely seem like a non-logical idea to go away. I guess you can think of it like this; you know how in some countries if one doesn't amount to anything, say get into college then a family sometimes creates the loss of honor, same thing as me not amounting to anything in society. I just want to be happy you know!

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@tkdboy 14,

tkdboy_14;168271 wrote:

What I really feel inside is not that I am running away from myself but instead I am running towards myself. I just don't like the repetitiveness of life in this social aspect. I do not see myself working a 9-5 job for the rest of my life, whatever makes somebody happy huh .

Neither did I but that is how it turned out. Be very mindful of John Lennon's sage advice: 'Life is what happens to you when you're busy making other plans'

tkdboy_14;168271 wrote:

Also it does not have to be the wild, I was thinking like a monastery or something like that, but since I am not hanging onto any religion, a monastery is hard to find. If anyone has any info on monasteries that are not religious but rather spiritual I would greatly appreciate that information.

Buddhism is thought by many to be 'spiritual rather than religious'. So are some of the other Indian yoga-type training centres. But all monastic centres are run around a daily timetable which usually starts very early in the morning, involves a lot of meditation and manual work and runs like clockwork. One possibility is to actually go on a retreat in one of those kinds of centres for 10 days or a couple of weeks and see how it goes.

I can tell you one thing for sure - if you've grown up in the suburbs, you have no idea how difficult survival can be. 'The Wilderness' is a nice romantic image but the reality of it is completely different. Again, it might well be worth trying to go on wilderness retreat first to get an idea of what it is really like.

And if you have career prospects, for heaven's sake don't give them up. There are 900 million Chinese who want to eat your breakfast.:bigsmile:

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@jeeprs,

jeeprs;168290 wrote:

Neither did I but that is how it turned out. Be very mindful of John Lennon's sage advice: 'Life is what happens to you when you're busy making other plans'

Buddhism is thought by many to be 'spiritual rather than religious'. So are some of the other Indian yoga-type training centres. But all monastic centres are run around a daily timetable which usually starts very early in the morning, involves a lot of meditation and manual work and runs like clockwork. One possibility is to actually go on a retreat in one of those kinds of centres for 10 days or a couple of weeks and see how it goes.

I can tell you one thing for sure - if you've grown up in the suburbs, you have no idea how difficult survival can be. 'The Wilderness' is a nice romantic image but the reality of it is completely different. Again, it might well be worth trying to go on wilderness retreat first to get an idea of what it is really like.

And if you have career prospects, for heaven's sake don't give them up. There are 900 million Chinese who want to eat your breakfast.:bigsmile:

I see, well, do you know of any places where I can go experience something like that say for a couple of weeks???? Anywhere in the world is fine. Also, what is your take on the repetitiveness of our human lives? Do you find satisfaction in what you do and if not how do you cope with it?

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@tkdboy 14,

tkdboy_14;168296 wrote:

I see, well, do you know of any places where I can go experience something like that say for a couple of weeks???? Anywhere in the world is fine. Also, what is your take on the repetitiveness of our human lives? Do you find satisfaction in what you do and if not how do you cope with it?

I really sympathise with how you're feeling. But your perspective changes as you grow older. My story. I kicked out against my upbringing - my dad was an academic high-flyer, became a professor at 33, was a world authority in his field and bcame a senior advisor to the World Health Organization. I was sent to a strict private school but rebelled against it. It was the late sixties and the atmosphere was electric. Vietnam demonstrations, the Beatles, Woodstock and lots of p*t. Timothy Leary told us all to 'tune in, turn on, drop out'. I discovered electric guitar and was convinced I was going to make it big.

Well, I didn't ever make anything out of music. In reality, I found that making a living was considerably harder than I had thought. I drove a cab, did various menial jobs. But I kept playing music, went to university and studied philosophy (mainly Eastern). Finally started getting a professional career together in my 30's. Doing OK now, but it is a grind.

But through my encounter with Eastern Philosophy and finally with Buddhist meditation, I have discovered the path of spiritual awareness, which has made it all worthwhile. I have succeeded in ways other than the professional - having a happy marriage and seeing two sons grow and be very together people. It's all good, really.

Now of course everyone is different, your experience could be completely different to anyone else's. Bill Gates dropped out of Harvard and started Microsoft, Steve Jobs also dropped out to start Apple. Who knows what could happen? Just bear in mind that life is often a lot tougher than it looks from the comfort of home.

As for retreat centres, just have a browse through Google. That is one thing that wasn't around when I was starting out. My only advice is, stay away from any that want to charge a lot of dollars. Find the ones that are motivated by being of service to the community.

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@mister kitten,

mister kitten;168268 wrote:

We all will, surely die, and we persist in our other commitments.

What's stopping you from visiting your folks tkd?

Well, he would probable die at most half a year to a year upon committing to that venture if he is lucky. The lack of fear at the face of one ` s demise. Don` t you love it, mister kitten?

1 Reply

@TuringEquivalent,

TuringEquivalent;168328 wrote:

Well, he would probable die at most half a year to a year upon committing to that venture if he is lucky. The lack of fear at the face of one ` s demise. Don` t you love it, mister kitten?

to bad that death is not the point.

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@tkdboy 14,

tkdboy_14;168000 wrote:

So this is going to be short and simple. I have an issue. I am currently going to be a Junior in College to add some background of mine. I am a musician which is what I study at school but what I want to do the rest of my life is to detach myself from society and live somewhere in the world where I have to completely make things myself. In other words, I want to live in the wild. Don't ask me why, it's just what I want. This is my situation, it seems that my life is heading very straight upwards as of now as a musician but to be honest, the only thing holding me back from leaving everything and going away is my family. Just because I love them and I guess I feel as though I would let them down if I did this. My mother already knows of this but she is scared. I really don't even know what to think anymore, what does someone do in a situation where they want something so bad when at the same time something just as great is holding them back?

Sure depends on your motivation of being a hermit.

Who says it would be permanent? It could be a few months, then you have had your satisfaction. Maybe you can maintain the connection to your famility through sattelite-phone, many help organisation helpers got such mobil phone.

Try it.

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Two Paths, which one????

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