No Sleep

this makes me want to cry...

It's dark outside and I am alone
And I have cried every tear
and counted every bone
And I'm alone and it's dark outside

Something is wrong and nothing is right
and I try and try to see the light
and it's dark in here in the middle of the night
and I pace the floor from flight to fight
and it's dark in here in the middle of the night

The shadows have cast me
and the light won't last me from here to there
and I'm all alone, and no one cares
how the night attacks me unaware
I have the light of love within me
and though it flickers, yet it burns
and it's dark outside with my tears all cried
and I'm alone and it's dark outside

fido, that sounds like a song...jerry lee lewis perhaps?

Jerry could never conceive of my pain...Ani Defranco, maybe..

of course not, he always had the face of the child. i was just picturing that kind of melody and voice to fit the words is all. middle age crazy was the best thing he ever did in my opinion...think i'll go look for it right now.

never heard of ani defranco.

Google her... She is one of the best poets, artist of this time...Good when she is talking about love, much less so introducing politics...Some really great arrangement, maybe a little too queer for most; but who says they do not love???

One of hers Shy: Ani Defranco

Well the heat is so great it plays tricks with the eyes
It turns road into water and water to sky
and there's a crack in the concrete floor and it starts at the sink
there's a restroom in the gas station and I have locked myself in it to think

back in the city the sun bakes trash on the curb
there are men pissing in doorways the rats are runninng in herds
and I had a dream with your face in it that scared me awake
and I put too much on the table and I got too much at stake

and I might let you off easy and I might lead you on
I might wait for you in the corner and then I might be gone
there's a come from and where I'm going and I am lost in between
I might go out to that phone booth and leave a veiled invitation on your machine

And you'll stop me won't you if you've heard this one before-
only one way to surprise you is showing up at your front door
saying let's not ask what next or how or why
I am leaving in the morning so let's not be shy

The door opens the room eases (?)
the house keeper comes in without a warning
and I squint at the muscular light
she jumps her keys jingle and she leaves as quickly as she came in
and I roll over and taste the pillow with my hand-

well the sheets are twisted and damp cause the heat is so great
and I swear I can feel the mattress sinking underneath your weight
well sleep is like a fever and I'm glad when it ends
and road flows like a river and its calling me back- again

and you'll stop me won't you if you've heard this one before etc

well the heat is so great etc

and you'll stop me won't you etc

It is better to show a what has become,
instead of a what you would have undone.
This is what you inspired in me.
Each line of your original poem for each rhyme i try.
Apart from one in the fith stanza where to be blun twith the truth is to be blunt about death.

The night never comes.

Yesterday ended as all would begun
Setting the moon, rising undone.
Did not wake or shake but had to speak
Of a stained single matress fallen on deep.
Once un-awake under thread, out of my head,
Out of the count, out from under the dread.
Dying for sleep, trying to rest
Conscious is loss, failure of test.

Trying no more, asleep I am not meant
Less effort out, less of an apointment.
Unconscious is hard when up is to be lied
Unconscious is hard when down is to hide.
Am I safer in a dreams costumed ball?
Eyes when open see the highs to fall.
Least the dream opens so ones survive
Not having choice the dreams will decide.

Giving away the thoughts would have you at task
Not in the running, prepared to take place last.
In dreams my needs and feelings all met
Still is a fluttering heart, still is all regret.
On out of fluff pillows dreams base and dreams grand
Heart needs not flight so needs not to know the land.
When ones goal and need is of the obliteration,
Sated in sleep unconscious is of best obligation.

Little hallucination can for the biggest of men,
Make a child without hand held, without a haven.
What to fear? a world of a man or of a consuming darkness
Facing a hell on my earth is still not confronting your abyss.
Men will shout but the dark is souls deafening
Long (as) you are sceaming your soul is still echoing.

Get up, get dressed, stop being a fake
More chance the soled foot for swift escape.

Not all angels are dressed all up in the light
Some must adorn darkness to show what wrong is to right.
Feed yourself knowledge, to know is how to gain
Pursuit of fulfillment, wisdoms asking for your name.
Responce is participation, is showing your truth
Why fear the death when dying is proof?

Yes rising to proove your soul can not die
Hardship when sertain that choice is the lie.
But angels are wisdom, so wisdom can fly
Your relief you muffle in dreams little sigh.
You try to make a friend of wisdoms desire,
By translating dreams into a poetry chior.
To be awake is to convert another to sleeping
Life takes sure tread, none of this creeping.

I anger my dark wise angel the once more
Using imaginations key poorly to lock all the doors.
But just because my rooms all are now barred,
Not harkening to angels alarm is still very hard.
But who would listen to one who wont fear?
My bed is drenched from the sweating of tears.
Soaked to the skin and deeper within,
At least it cant end if i never begin.

No excusses made to a sun i want set
Things not done are things we forget.
God give me a plan, give me a disease,
Something to fight, something to please.
But thanks must still be given for the life of the dreamers,
At least a slave when alseep sometimes forgets hes forevers.

When nightmare is awake that giver of dread,
What is the wisdom of leaving your bed?