@hawkeye10,
Another piece in the April Atlantic talks about how there is precious little evidence that high level of parental participation in our kids academic life helps to create a better outcome. I figured as much long ago, and was considered a neglectful parent when I told the school that the problem they were calling about with my high schooler was my kids problem to solve not mine. In the last few years it has become "manditory" for a parent to come to quarterly parent teacher conferences. I was always WTF about them, I dont do conferences after grade 8. I do go to the freshmen intake program where the school personnel yak to parents and kids about the "new adventure" of high school, and that is my last involvement with my kids school directly. From then on I look at report cards, write checks and talk to my kid only.
I had to do a couple of these "mandatory" meetings because my wife was in Iraq..... I went, told them that I was "here" as demanded and had no desire to hear anything that they had to say, and stated I intended to now leave. The duty was said to be fulfilled.