Nope, 1st place they look .... I got it ... the circus.... meet you in Baraboo Wisconsin If the circus don't pan out we can always string yoyos
Bring your snorkel and mask.
Or we could steal our Daddies' cues and make our living playing pool
Wake up Edgar there's something I have to say to you ....it's late September andI really should be back in school ...cause I got the steadily depressing low down mind messing working at the car was hblues
The ain't no cure for the summertime carwash blues
Oh yeah ... amen brother ... but I got the walking pneumonia and the boogie woogie blues
I've decided to go back to Birmingham
Way down in Alabam
See my old Aunt Mary and a girl I left there.
WAUGHHHHHHHHHHH I feel good ba dadada da da I knew that I would ba dadada da da......
Actually I feel shitty ..... woke up this morning with my head on the keyboard and 'cvbnm ' imprinted on my forehead ......
I got a chuckle out of those myself Nimh
Human stuff
I only got 12 out of twenty on the fake smiles.
Hi Ed... the eyes have it :wink:
A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that her name is Patricia Whack.
"Miss Whack, I'd like to get a $30,000 loan to take a holiday."
Patty looks at the frog in disbelief and asks his name. The frog says his name is Kermit Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger, and that it's okay, he knows the bank manager.
Patty explains that he will need to secure the loan with some collateral.
The frog says, "Sure. I have this," and produces a tiny porcelain elephant, about an inch tall, bright pink and perfectly formed.
Very confused, Patty explains that she'll have to consult with the bank manager and disappears into a back office.
She finds the manager and says, "There's a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow $30,000, and he wants to use this as collateral."
She holds up the tiny pink elephant. "I mean, what in the world is this?"
(you're gonna love this)
(its a real treat)
(a masterpiece)
(wait for it)
The bank manager looks back at her and says...
"It's a knickknack, Patty Whack. Give the frog a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone."
(You're singing it, aren't you? )
Gelisgesti wrote:
The bank manager looks back at her and says...
"It's a knickknack, Patty Whack. Give the frog a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone."
(You're singing it, aren't you? )
Loved it!
And loves starting my day off with a smile.......thank-you.
When ya gota go
Plus a few good links for your best friend
January 28, 1873
Sidonie-Gabrielle Colette (1873 - 1954)
Colette & Claudine
by Steve King
On this day in 1873 Colette (Sidonie-Gabrielle Colette) was born outside Paris. Even given her mythologizing, and her intentional blurring of the lines in her autobiographical fiction, Colette's full and sensational life made her one of the most popular writers and personalities in the first half of the twentieth century. She wrote over fifty books, and is credited and blamed with much: having invented the modern teenager (presented in her early Claudine novels); being the first modern woman (based on her intention to live "in the most normal manner I know, which is according to [my] pleasure"); being the first superstar (her self-promotion, her own line of chocolates and cosmetics, her personal gym, her cake-and-eat-it-too lament for privacy); being the first actress to bare her breasts on stage (or not bare them in a jeweled bra, or in man's clothing); being one of the first to write about the faked orgasm; being the first woman to be given, in 1954, a state funeral. Whether as Simone de Beauvoir or Madonna, she knocked the top-hat off more than one husband and the age, and most of the thousands at the funeral were women.
If Colette helped shape a new era, her four-book Claudine series, published beginning in 1900, is regarded as striking the first blow. Judith Thurman's recent biography (Secrets of the Flesh, 1999; there have been several other new ones) discusses Claudine at School, the opening book in the series, along such symbolic lines. The novel begins with the girls' old school being torn down, Claudine discovering that its walls were not full and thick but "hollow as armoires, with a kind of black corridor between them, where there's nothing but dust and a frightful, repulsive old smell. I amuse myself by frightening Marie Belhomme, telling her that these mysterious hiding places were contrived in the olden days to immure women who had deceived their husbands." The last scene of the novel is a dedication ceremony for the new school; as the traditional rites and pieties are observed, Claudine and her friends deliver their best, teenage lip-service. Thurman's summary: "And the girls who have spent two hundred pages comparing breasts, fighting in the dust, lusting for each other, and for their teachers of both sexes, struggling for their places in a pecking order as a vertical as that of any barnyard or corporation, listen to the speeches with lowered eyes, in dresses of First Communion white, and lift their off-key voices in "The Hymn to Nature."
Another recent biographer says that, from the commercial point of view, Colette's Claudine series "is one of the greatest, if not the greatest, in all of French literature." The legendary story of how her first husband locked her in a closet to write them is apparently not accurate; it is true that he took credit for writing the series, that he was unethical and debauched, that Colette started sleeping with his mistress while on the second book, and that she would soon leave him far behind.
My old playground. I fondly remember me n m pals growing to teenhood there.
I know man, you go in there and .... before you know it you cannot remember how the heck to get out ..... my buddy Dave is still in there.
Inside every older lady is a younger lady -- wondering what the hell
happened.
-Cora Harvey Armstrong->
Inside me lives a skinny woman crying to get out. But I can usually
shut her up with cookies.
The hardest years in life are those between ten and seventy.
-Helen Hayes (at 73)-
I refuse to think of them as chin hairs. I think of them as stray
eyebrows.
-Janette Barber-
Things are going to get a lot worse before they get worse.
-Lily Tomlin-
A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who never owned a car.
-Carrie Snow-
Laugh and the world laughs with you. Cry and you cry with your
girlfriends.
-Laurie Kuslansky-
My second favorite household chore is ironing. My first being, hitting
my head on the top bunk bed until I faint.
-Erma Bombeck-
Old age ain't no place for sissies.
-Bette Davis-
A man's got to do what a man's got to do. A woman must do what he
can't.
-Rhonda Hansome-
The phrase "working mother" is redundant.
-Jane Sellman-
Every time I close the door on reality, it comes in through the
windows.
-Jennifer Unlimited-
Whatever women must do they must do twice as well as men to be thought
half as good. Luckily, this is not difficult.
-Charlotte Whitton-
Thirty-five is when you finally get your head together and your body
starts falling apart.
-Caryn Leschen-
I try to take one day at a time -- but sometimes several days attack me
at once.
-Jennifer Unlimited-
If you can't be a good example -- then you'll just have to be a
horrible warning.
-Catherine-
When I was young, I was put in a school for retarded kids for two
years before they realized I actually had a hearing loss. And they called
ME slow!
-Kathy Buckley-
I'm not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm not
dumb -- and I'm also not blonde.
-Dolly Parton-
If high heels were so wonderful, men would still be wearing them.
-Sue Grafton-
I'm not going to vacuum 'til Sears makes one you can ride on.
-Roseanne Barr-
When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men invade
another country..
-Elayne Boosler-
Behind every successful man is a surprised woman.
-Maryon Pearson-
In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man. If you want
anything done, ask a woman.
-Margaret Thatcher-
I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine marriage and a
career.
-Gloria Steinem-
I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man, I keep his
house.
-Zsa Zsa Gabor-
Nobody can make you feel inferior without your permission.
-Eleanor Roosevelt-
Send this to five bright women you know and make their day.
Every woman I know is bright --so I am sending to several
