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Marketers of Whizzenator Plead Guilty

 
 
Reply Tue 25 Nov, 2008 08:10 pm
PITTSBURGH " Two men whose company sold a device known as the Whizzinator that helped men cheat on drug tests have pleaded guilty in federal court in Pittsburgh.

George Wills and Robert Catalano each pleaded guilty Monday to two conspiracy counts. They owned the California-based Internet company Puck Technology.

The Whizzinator is a prosthetic penis that comes with a heating element and fake urine. U.S. Attorney Mary Beth Buchanan's office says the goal of it and another device called Number 1 was to help people pass drug tests.

The devices were sold from 2005 to 2008. The California men are scheduled to be sentenced in February and face up to eight years in prison, a half-million-dollar fine or both.

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Type: Discussion • Score: 9 • Views: 2,465 • Replies: 16
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Rockhead
 
  1  
Reply Tue 25 Nov, 2008 08:30 pm
@edgarblythe,
damn legal technicalities, anyway...

(bet they made more than the fines)
0 Replies
 
Reyn
 
  0  
Reply Tue 25 Nov, 2008 09:00 pm
@edgarblythe,
http://snarkerati.com/movie-news/files/2008/04/arnold-schwarzenegger-the-terminator.jpg
I'll be back....in a minute. I've just run out of pee.
0 Replies
 
NickFun
 
  1  
Reply Tue 25 Nov, 2008 09:23 pm
I notice doing a quick internet search that the Whizzinator is still available online! Whew!
edgarblythe
 
  1  
Reply Tue 25 Nov, 2008 09:25 pm
@NickFun,
Better get yours now, dude.
NickFun
 
  0  
Reply Tue 25 Nov, 2008 10:28 pm
@edgarblythe,
You betcha Edgar. I may buy two. Never know when you're going to need an extra penis!
0 Replies
 
Merry Andrew
 
  1  
Reply Tue 25 Nov, 2008 11:22 pm
Am I super-dumb or what? The story says they pleaded guilty in Federal court. It doesn't say what they were found guilty of, just conspiracy. Conspiracy to what? Defraud the government testers or defraud the public? It doesn't even indicate whether this silly-sounding doo-dad actually works. Does it do what it's supposed to? Or was it a scam all along?
roger
 
  2  
Reply Tue 25 Nov, 2008 11:39 pm
@Merry Andrew,
Good thought. I think they use conspiracy when they can't come up with a felony worth prosecuting. Conspiracy to commit a misdemeanor becomes a felony.

Classic example is from Michner's The Drifters. Imagine two guys slinking down an ally in Philadelphia, conspiring to kill a bald eagle. Now that they have conspired to commit a felony, they become ineligible for the draft, if convicted. No eagles in Philadelphia? No problem. They don't have to kill an eagle. All they need to do is to "conspire to".
OCCOM BILL
 
  1  
Reply Wed 26 Nov, 2008 12:44 am
I don't understand what Law was broken. Seems odd.
0 Replies
 
Mr Stillwater
 
  1  
Reply Wed 26 Nov, 2008 01:47 am
Well, as I always say; "You can put it into the hands of your attorneys, but it won't stand up in court".
0 Replies
 
msolga
 
  1  
Reply Wed 26 Nov, 2008 04:15 am
@edgarblythe,
Another version of the Whizzenator (with an entirely different purpose), from Oz ....:

http://www.theage.com.au/ffximage/2008/11/26/261108_cartoon_gallery__564x400.jpg
squinney
 
  1  
Reply Wed 26 Nov, 2008 06:33 am
@roger,
Conspiracy to provide a mistdeweiner.

I wonder if companies that sell the pills that make drugs not show up in urine are also breaking some kind of law. Why haven't they been prosecuted?
cjhsa
 
  1  
Reply Wed 26 Nov, 2008 06:52 am
@roger,
roger wrote:

Good thought. I think they use conspiracy when they can't come up with a felony worth prosecuting. Conspiracy to commit a misdemeanor becomes a felony.

Classic example is from Michner's The Drifters. Imagine two guys slinking down an ally in Philadelphia, conspiring to kill a bald eagle. Now that they have conspired to commit a felony, they become ineligible for the draft, if convicted. No eagles in Philadelphia? No problem. They don't have to kill an eagle. All they need to do is to "conspire to".


At 5-5-1, the Eagles haven't really shown up this year, but, last I looked, they were still in Philly.
0 Replies
 
Merry Andrew
 
  1  
Reply Wed 26 Nov, 2008 07:34 am
@squinney,
That's my point, Squinney. I don't think there are any laws against selling paraphernalia to fool drug testers... if the merchandise actually works. The "conspiracy" must have been to sell this Rube Goldberg contraption which, to me, doesn't sound as though it would fool anyone. But the story, as posted, doesn't explain that. Rookie reporters.
0 Replies
 
Merry Andrew
 
  1  
Reply Wed 26 Nov, 2008 07:39 am
@msolga,
That made my day, msolga. Not so much the product as the ad itself. I particularly like that nice touch of the hose running from the pants leg.
Tai Chi
 
  1  
Reply Wed 26 Nov, 2008 07:43 am
@Merry Andrew,
Merry Andrew wrote:

That made my day, msolga. Not so much the product as the ad itself. I particularly like that nice touch of the hose running from the pants leg.


Me too! (Why pollute the water when you can "make water"?)
0 Replies
 
msolga
 
  1  
Reply Thu 27 Nov, 2008 01:47 am
@Merry Andrew,
Andrew & Tai

That was a cartoon from yesterday's Age newspaper (Melbourne, Oz).
With the continuing (never ending?) drought & water shortages, we are absolutely obsessed (!) by what are we going to do if it doesn't rain (like crazy!) soon? People are investing in home water tanks, the state government is investing in a huge desalinization plant, there are fueds between the country & city about water being diverted to the city .... you have no idea!
So this cartoon is a tongue in cheek depiction of one of the many, many suggested solutions: The conversion of human urine into drinking water. Pretty nifty invention! Wink
Glad you enjoyed it.

Sorry to digress from your topic, edgar, but I couldn't help myself!
0 Replies
 
 

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