kjrc
 
Reply Fri 10 Oct, 2008 05:33 pm
hi i was just wondering about child custody my wife left me 3 months ago we have two children together but she has also left the kids she has not seen them for 3 months she has but only for a couple of days here and there i have had them with me for the majority of the time i was just wondering how the court system woud view that and if that would give me a better chance of getting custody of them because she said she wants to have custody of the kids but its been 3 months now and she just expects me to let her have custody of the kids now that she is done messing around i also want to add she has always said that she wanted custody of the kids and at first when she left i was ok with it but its been three months now and i just think that if she was really serious about being with her kids she would have been here with them she has been in a different state for a majority of the three months because she met another man so i have decided to fight her for custody i was just wondering if anyone knew anything about like abondoning children like that or anything
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Type: Question • Score: 3 • Views: 1,479 • Replies: 5
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alex240101
 
  1  
Reply Fri 10 Oct, 2008 05:54 pm
@kjrc,
Hello kjrc.
Yes, having the kids with you, will work in your favor. The court system will see that as the kids "established custodial enviroment". You should go to the circuit court, and get a temporary custody order (assuming a divorce has been filed. The custody order must be filed with, or after the divorce papers.)
Sorry to hear about this, and good luck.
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ehBeth
 
  1  
Reply Fri 10 Oct, 2008 05:58 pm
@kjrc,
Hi kjrc.

Welcome to able2know.

Alex has some good advice.

What jurisdiction do you live in?
kjrc
 
  1  
Reply Fri 10 Oct, 2008 06:16 pm
@ehBeth,
I live in New York we have not filed for a divore and i don't think we will i think we are just going to file a leagal seperation but my kids are 2 and 3 while we were together she was the one to take care of them everyday mostly because i went out and worked and she was a stay at home mom but i was still here all of the time with her and the kids unless i was working is that going to have an effect because she was the stay at home mom or will it be better for me because she pretty much left for three months
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kjrc
 
  1  
Reply Fri 10 Oct, 2008 06:21 pm
i am also going to go and get temporary custody of them
jespah
 
  1  
Reply Sat 11 Oct, 2008 07:05 am
@kjrc,
Note: I am offering this as friendly advice and am not acting in the capacity of an attorney to you.

Get yourself a divorce lawyer. Even if you think you will not file for divorce, you need to be prepared in case it happens. Tell the lawyer that you want a formal separation agreement set up, with you being the custodial parent but with your wife having full visitation rights, if that is what you want. Show proof that you have had the kids with you (this means not photos but rather things like grocery bills) and that she has not.

Divorce lawyers are expensive and they charge by the hour, so be ready before you walk into anyone's office. And, yes, they are expensive, but having this set is going to be worth it. You may end up going to Family Court (not Circuit Court; the only Circuit Courts in New York are Federal appellate courts and they do not have jurisdiction herein) even if it isn't an actual divorce. The courts will act in the best interests of your children and, if you have been their sole care provider for the last three months, that looks good for you, but if your wife was their sole care provider for years before that then things will not be quite so black and white.
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