9/19: Arrrrr!

The pirate encyclopedia:

that be a funny picture, you scurvy son of a seadog, arrrrgh

Shiver me timbers!

OOOOOOOOOOOoooh Arrrrrrrrrrrrr

Why does it take pirates so long to learn the alphabet?..Because they can spend years at C.
What brand of clothes do pirates wear?..Arrrrrrrrmani!

These are not my jokes.

Aye, on this fine day everyone can talk like a pirate all day long. 'Tis a fine way t'be speakin', and if ye disagree may ye walk the ol' plank and send ye ta ol' Davy Jones' Locker!

And if ye' be pirate-speak challenged, here be a translator for ye' .... PIRATE TALK TRANSLATOR.

Ahoy, okay, I'm finished. Ye'll ne'er get me buried booty!

Red Beard Pete: Settle down, settle down, settle down. Ahoy! Maties! I welcome ye to the fourth annual pirate convention. I be your moderator Red Beard Pete. We first like to thank the good people of the Milwaukee Holiday Inn for the accommodations. Not our first choice but there was no vacancy at our favorite hotel the Ritz CA-R-R-R-R-R-R-LTON.

Red Beard Pete: All right, all right we don´t need a roll call. Ok, first order of business. Picking a location for next year´s convention. Any ideas?

Bartholomew: A-R-R-R-R-R-R-KANSAS!!

Red Beard Pete: Maybe. Anyone else?

Pirate 1: MADAGASCA-R-R-R-R-R-R!

Red Beard Pete: Nice one.

Dinkins: Boston.

Red Beard Pete: Hmmm, Boston? Kind of an odd choice.

Dinkins: Bear with me. We can drive there and when we arrive, we can PA-R-R-RK THE CA-R-R-R IN THE HA-R-R-R-RVAR-R-R-RD YA-R-R-R-R-RD!!!

-- Pirate Convention (SNL, Season 31: Episode 11)

I tell this joke every "Speak Like a Pirate Day"...

A pirate walks into a bar and orders rum. The bartender serves him and
can't help but notice that the pirate has a wooden leg, a hook, and an eye
patch.

The bartender can't help himself. He has to ask "So, how did you end up with
the wooden leg?"

The pirate says "Arrr. We was in storm, we was, off the Bermudas. I was
swept overboard. Me men pulled me back on board, but not before a shark
bit me leg off."

"And what about your hook"?

"Shiver me timbers!", replied the pirate, "I lost me hand to a cutlass in a
battle for a Spanish treasure ship."

"Wow! How did you lose your eye"?

"Arrr... Twas a seagull pooped in me eye."

"You lost your eye beause of seagull poop???!!!"

"Well... It was me first day with the hook."

Arrrr me mateys, here's what I said to me mates at the office today, "let's go t' t' meetin' and talk about data loadin'". And arrr we did, right there, we did.

10 infamous pirates
http://www.boston.com/lifestyle/gallery/famous_pirates/
Pirate lingo quiz
http://www.boston.com/ae/lighter_side/talk_like_a_pirate_day/

A pirate walks into a bar. He's got a steering wheel stuck down his pants. The bartender asks him what that's for. The pirate says, "Aarr, It's drivin' me nuts!"

That..was...funny swimpy...and that's when I was asked to leave.

Aye, but have any of ye watched a pirate-y movie or swilled some grog ordered from a saucy bar wench? Ar have ye played POTC online, a game I'm loathe ta tell ye I'm a bit addicted to meself. Drink up me hearties, yo-ho! So git ta piratin- ya filthy maggots and scaberous dogs. There be lots to do afore the day's dun! I say we make it a whole bloody week. What say ye?!

I had never heard of "talk like a pirate day" until it turned up as an answer on the 19 September NY Times crossword puzzle (31 across).

Always check here first.

Ya, we're cuttin' edge, me mateys!

...or cutlass edge...

hey hey another dad person wheres Drew dad. We'll have a dad party.

no moms allowed ('cept fer shewolf)