There is no known author for this poem, and i doubt that anyone will ever figure out it's origins. Someone has CLAIMED that they had invented this rhyme, but i doubt it is true. Here is the version i commonly hear:
Ladies and gentlemen, short and stout,
I will tell you a story i know nothing about,
The admission is free so pay at the door,
Pull up a chair and sit on the floor.
One fine day in the middle of the night,
Two dead boys got up to fight,
Back to back they faced each other,
Drew their swords and shot each other.
A blind man came to watch fair play,
A mute man came to shout "Hurray!"
A deaf policeman heard the noise,
And came to stop those two dead boys.
He lived on the corner in the middle of the block,
In a two-story house on a vacant lot;
A man with no legs came walking by,
And kicked the lawman in his theigh.
He crashed through a wall without a sound,
Into a dry river bed and suddenly drowned;
A long black hearse came to cart him away,
But he ran for his life and is still gone today.
I watched from the corner of a big round table,
I the only eyewitness to the facts of my fable;
But if you doubt my lies are true,
Just ask the blind man, for he saw it too.