editing for passage meant for Year 3 students

Re: editing for passage meant for Year 3 students
I enjoy watching birds fly freely in the sky. They are not slowed down by traffic jams. That is one of the reasons why I wish I were a bird.

If I were a bird, I would not have to go to school, do any homework or study. I would not have to feel stress because of school work. I also would not have to worry about examinations. However, I would have to go in search of food because I would not be able to buy it like people can.

If I could not find any food, I would be hungry. This is one of the disadvantages of being a bird. Sometimes I might see food discarded by people and I would quickly eat it before another bird came along.

I wouldn't have to pay to travel. People have to pay for air tickets. Sometimes aeroplanes crash and passengers die. If I were a bird, I would not have such a problem. However, aeroplanes can fly much faster than a bird, and they don't feel tired. If I were a bird, I would become tired after flying for too long.

Although people have more things to enjoy, I do not even have a hobby. However, I would still rather be a bird than a person.


Yoong Liat, I am quite tired after replacing all those "did"s with "would"s. Maybe you need to study verbs some more? The definite articles need work too.

Also, birds don't just eat things discarded by people. They eat fruit, berries, insects, etc.

Thanks, Contrex, for editing the passage. Writng a passage about "I wish I were ... " is, in my opinion, one of the toughest topics. In fact, I was never taught how to write such a passage when I was at school. I believe many non-natives will have problems too. Correct me if I'm wrong in my belief.

Thanks once again.

Best wishes.