0
   

A Little Short - Unfinished

 
 
Reply Sat 15 Sep, 2007 10:24 pm
This is what I have so far.
I have advanced into this with no idea what it would develop into; I simply opened Pages and typed whatever came into my mind.
Note that I just read two Jose Saramago books, so the style may come off as a little familiar Razz . So, can anyone please give me pointers on the style, or on how to continue - your opinions on what this should develop into. By the way, I don't know if age factors into this, but...I'm 13, so cut me some slack. Or maybe not . Rolling Eyes


Thanks in advance.

The boy looked at the huge row of breakfast cereals, each box decorated with bright colors and promises of an increased supply of vitamins and energy and whatnot, and promises of a chance to catch the premiere of a movie, and promises of a free plastic toy - shameless merchandising, yes, but nonetheless effective. A little voice inside the boy dared to remark that they were all probably made of the same combination of wheat, sugar, and obscure chemicals, but it was quickly shut off as the boy pointed at the one with the boldest, most prominent packaging, and with the most promises of a great taste and lucky draw prizes, once again proving humanity's ability to capture uniqueness among drabness, and how well it complemented greed and the belief of triumph over insurmountable odds. Papa, I want this.

Papa looked around from the canned tuna, saw the box that the little finger prodded, and mechanically tossed it into the supermarket trolley, whether from fear of evoking another tantrum, or simply accepting that the boy had to eat, and if he did, why not make him happy along the way.

A grin spread across the boy's face, happy his wish for breakfast cereal had been fulfilled. The father, too, smiled, a reflection of the boy's delight, and why not, for, as so many parenting books had told him, if his son was happy, so should he.
  • Topic Stats
  • Top Replies
  • Link to this Topic
Type: Discussion • Score: 0 • Views: 731 • Replies: 1
No top replies

 
dadpad
 
  1  
Reply Sat 15 Sep, 2007 11:24 pm
Premise A child gets everthing he wants. The child thinks nothing of it nor do the people who provide for the child. As the child grows he discovers that everything he wishes for come true all he needs do is concentrate hard enough, in the right kind of way.

Later we discover it is the childs ESP and or mind control powers that make the wishes happen.

The child grows to adulthood getting everything he wishes for except for one thing. The one thing he truly desires...
0 Replies
 
 

Related Topics

What inspired you to write...discuss - Discussion by lostnsearching
It floated there..... - Discussion by Letty
Small Voices - Discussion by Endymion
Rockets Red Glare - Discussion by edgarblythe
Short Story: Wilkerson's Tank - Discussion by edgarblythe
The Virtual Storytellers Campfire - Discussion by cavfancier
1st Annual Able2Know Halloween Story Contest - Discussion by realjohnboy
Literary Agents (a resource for writers) - Discussion by Craven de Kere
 
  1. Forums
  2. » A Little Short - Unfinished
Copyright © 2024 MadLab, LLC :: Terms of Service :: Privacy Policy :: Page generated in 0.04 seconds on 04/27/2024 at 05:07:16